As of today, I have NOT baked one cookie, nor have I made any candy. Fixing dinner, each night, in an of itself, has been challenging enough!!!! Homeschool is taking SUCH a huge, HUGE junk out of my day, it leaves me no time to bake.
In the old days, I would have been upset with my time being so unbalanced. I would have plunged ahead, making several batches of cookies (or at least the dough) and been so very tired, in the process. And *that* would have made me even more grouchy.
(dining room table)
(silver and white - don't know why it looks gold)
Today, when it was 1:30pm and time for lunch, I didn't dwell on the fact we had barely made it through half of today's assignments. The girls are missing absolutely simple, silly things.
Like:
"What's wroooooong with this. What am I doing wrooooooooong?!" (those spellings indicate a whine in their voices)
Me: "What number comes between 42 and 44?"
"Um, 50?"
"No! No! Wait!!! I mean 11? no, ummmm . . . 6?" (my question marks indicate their lack of confidence)
"No! Wait! Oh, I don't knoooooooooooooooooooooooooow, this is too haaaaaaaaaaaaard," they wail.
And I'm not making that question up. It really was in the 2nd grade math book, just like that: "What number comes between 42 and 44?"
(expelling large breath, here, before continuing)
Nope! No cookies baked. I've cluttered the bar with every ingredient a number of recipes could possibly contain, except for the eggs. There are three sticks of softened butter that have been sitting there, since Sunday.
I know I have everything I will need, because there are bare spots in my cupboards and hardly any room left on the bar to prepare dinner. Ha! I caught myself making a typo! I almost wrote . . . "hardly any room to *repair* dinner," which is exactly what I had to do, last night.
Repair the vegetable beef soup I had made.
Jesse came home and lifted the pan's lid and informed me there was no broth in my "soup." I had left the soup to simmer over a VERY small flame, but, I guess, it had been a while since I'd last checked it. I quickly prayed, threw in a can of beef broth, two cans of water and we had "soup" again!
Yesterday and today, I've been fighting a horrible pinched nerve in my neck and right shoulder. Pretty bad, pain.
I've prayed and prayed that God would help me enjoy this season and would not allow me to put myself in a tail spin, if things don't go exactly as planned. At 57 1/2 years old, you'd think I'd know that by now.
But I don't.
(the holiday "crystal" - glasses purchased over the years from Arby's!!!!!!!!!)
This period of time is also teaching the girls that their lack of attentiveness to their school assignments is rendering them cookie-less! If it's 3pm and I haven't even cleaned up the homeschool books, I've given up on the idea of starting another mess by making cookies. The disappointment in their faces is temporary. Today, I told my children if I attempted to bake cookies, I'd keel over. They didn't question me. I don't even know if they can define the word "keel," but I must have *looked* like I was about to explode. They didn't try to change my mind and all three took me quite seriously!
What I *do* plan to do, is read them some of the poems and stories from my old issues of "Ideals" Christmas magazines, while I plot what is about to become of the five chicken breasts thawing out in the kitchen.
Several times, the girls have asked me for a Christmas list and I posted one on the refrigerator door, today. Most of what I want is dollar store stuff, but I REALLY want them. White wash rags for the kitchen, hand lotion for my desk drawer, emery boards, rat tail plastic combs, and other such items.
I know for sure, I've become my grandmother. I *truly* enjoy those cheap little items, because I'm so grateful I don't have to shop for them myself!

(Annamarie)
I've lit candles for the evening (bayberry and pine) and I've turned the mini lights on in my 3 ficus trees.
It's almost 5pm AND I'M NOT STRESSED.
God has answered my prayers.
I'll try again tomorrow to bake. If it doesn't happen, I'll try again on Thursday. If Thursday produces no cookies, we'll see about the next day. Since our last day of school is this Friday, I'll see how things go next week. The cookie list may have to be shortened, but I'm determined to enjoy this time.

(Rissy)
Some things are always the same at Christmas time, around here. We have traditional foods/meals and I always find time to make my mother's bourbon balls.
I also do certain things a little different, each year.
A long time ago, I put encoded numbers on the gifts with no one's name. Only *I* knew what number went to each child.
A few years ago, we went to church before opening stockings and gifts. We *saw* everything but waited to "celebrate" with gifts and food.
Last year, Jesse put the gifts on the floor, forming a little pathway to the den. Rissy asked if we could do it again. She liked hunting for gifts. We sent a child to hunt for a gift. Whichever gift you found, you took it to the person who's name was on the tag. You couldn't retrieve one for yourself. You had to put it down and let someone else discover your gift.
THIS year, I'm trying my best to wrap EVERYTHING in a box. And, mainly shirt boxes. Children usually look at a shirt box gift and disappointingly think to themselves, "Oh, it's clothes."
My children all enjoy new clothes, but they are "children" and still like a little something to "play with," even if it's grown up play things. I bought jewelry, books, knick knacks, beauty care products, lotions, etc., this year, and most all will be delivered in shirt boxes. Ha! I'm loving it!
Back to the attitude. So many people complain about the "Christmas rush" and the "traffic" and the "people" everywhere. Well, what would it be without the crazy chaos? What would it be like if things went so smoothly, no one enjoyed a sigh within themselves because they "got it all together, no matter the late hours spent"?????
Rubbing elbows with others is all part of it.
I know celebrating Christmas doesn't come from Bible edicts or instructions, handed down through the years.
Jesus never said to remember and celebrate His birthday. But He *DID* speak of "peace" and He also spoke of "doing unto others." I can't help but think one of the best tests we have, when gauging our progress in our Christian walk, is when we ask ourselves questions like:
"Was I able to demonstrate patience, just now, when a third person shoved ahead of me in line?"
"Am I able to *love one another* when that man let the door shut in my face or that woman took *my* parking spot?"
"Do I have joy in my heart, despite this self imposed and crazy treadmill of a list I'm racing to fulfill? And that stupid song? Who made it up those lyrics and wrote that maniacal music. And, why oh WHY do they play it over and over again on the radio and in the stores???"
Those are ALL things Jesus taught about.
And, thank you LORD for your generous mercy, as we continually fall short of the mark.
As we grow in our Christian walk, there are fruits of the Spirit our lives should exhibit. Without praying and asking God for help (or even the desire) in weeding out the bad attributes, we can never hope to progress from the unhappy, joylessness of the season to having real JOY in our hearts, LOVE for other human beings, and PEACE within. No matter what, all of our busy lists and trappings shouldn't touch or steal our JOY, LOVE, or PEACE.
Since I've brought up the subject of joy, love, and peace this season, I'd like to ask for continued prayers for my mother in law. In November she lost her husband. Six days later, her mother. Now, one of her older brothers, who's battled cancer, may not live through the month. She needs the prayers of others to make it through this season - one of the hardest she's ever endured.
(big breath) And, now, I'm off to put the chicken in the oven and read some stories to my children!
Be Blessed ~
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