Yesterday's procedure was horribly painful - just excruciating.

The doctor was 2 hours late (he was in a complicated surgery) and I had been sitting in their uncomfortable chair for many hours, which caused pressure on my sacrum/lower back area.

By yesterday evening, I felt like my lower back and my head were going to explode.  Migraine pills and muscle relaxers finally made me fall asleep (around 8:45pm) and I was able to sleep all night. 

Again, the anesthesia didn't do a thing and the doctor kept apologizing during the procedure because I was, obviously, suffering silently, or so I thought..

He didn't hold much hope for this to be a success and said he might have to step it up to another procedure that was "pretty brutal" as far as pain.  He told me I could look it up online, but I am to remember he DOES give some anesthesia locally.  It's called a Discogram and I haven't had the courage to look it up.

I'm still pretty shaky, but I sat up for a while before lunch, in the den, and did some mending.  Stephanie came over and watched the girls (and me, I guess), as well as checked the girls' school work, did some dishes, and promised to make a cake when she comes tomorrow.

I would appreciate more prayers for me to recover from this last doozie in my neck, and also prayers that I might have the Holy Spirit's wisdom regarding any future spine procedures.

Thanks so much for always being such faithful prayer warriors!  Y'all are the best of friends to me!

Be Blessed  ~

We mailed two boxes of presents on Saturday morning, another faux pas on my part.  I simply didn't light a fire under Jesse, soon enough, to make decisions about what gifts to buy. 

They were mailed Saturday and her birthday was Monday.

I'm really kicking myself over the whole issue of being late!

Anyhoo, BELATED HAPPY BIRTHDAY, NIKKI DOODLE DOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                        
P.S.  Nikki, if you want me to quit posting this picture, you need to send me new ones!  LOL! 

                     **********************************************************************************************

Wow!

I didn't expect such an enthusiastic response to  my "Which Picture" question! 

Everyone left such nice compliments and I thank you all for of them.  Y'all are so sweet!   

As you can see, Picture #8, was the winner. 

I like it, too, because the lighting was good, the dark background showed my hair and face better, AND it had a touch of the aqua sweater I was wearing.  With my pale face, color around it is always a good thing!

      
                               The beginning of fall - only a few leaves on the ground!

I also had a lot of question or comments that I want to answer in this post.

1)  Holding my veil on with combs.  I'd have to find some really tight teeth in the combs and some that are light weight.  A regular plastic, small comb slides right through my thin hair - unless I make a rat ball at the roots of my hair.  My hair is seriously thin and soft.

2)  Almost everyone made a comment about my skin.  AND, Amber asked about skin care tips!  Oh, Amber, your mouth will drop when I answer you - for sure!  

     I wash my hair and let the diluted shampoo drip down my face and THAT'S what I use to wash my face.  I also have a glycerin bar of soap from Bath and Body Works for the days I don't wash my hair.  Head & Shoulders shampoo - sometimes a cheap Suave brand - that's what I use! 

     I have VERY dry skin, and I moisturize, moisturize, moisturize my skin from head to toe.  That means, I use the shea butter cream from, Bath and Body Works, on my face, too.    (are you shocked, yet?)

     I know . . . HORROR of all HORRORS!!!!! 

     A few Saturdays a month, I try to remember to use a clay mask (currently am using "Freeman Avocado and Oatmeal" from Wal-Mart). 

     That's it!  Lots of PH balanced shampoo and heavy body cream on my face.  I also have a lighter moisturizing cream by Pond's - the jar with the blue lid.  I use it in between, when my face feels dry.

    I really hold no secrets.  I've never taken care of my skin except with soap, water, and a heavy cream or lotion.  Maybe that's it, my pores are frozen in time!!!!!!!!  

     Seriously, the rest of my secret is genetics, of which I have no idea, whatsoever!  My mother's sister, Aunt Doris, has always been beautiful and very youthful (still is).  My mother died at a younger age than I am now, she also looked younger than her age.  And THEIR mother (my grandmother) looked younger. 

Does that mean genetics?  I just don't know! 

           
                                          Fall leaves, as seen through the net around the trampoline!

3)   No, I haven't found my new hair growth to be any finer or softer than before.  In fact, it's more healthy, because I have put no chemicals on it.  I've always had slightly curly hair, horrible cowlicks, and the texture has always been super fine, baby-like hair.  Even children's hair barrettes slide out of my hair.

4)   Yes, I went from a cue ball head to a tennis ball, too!!!  In fact, in the middle of chemo treatment, my two front left upper teeth (a bridge) fell out during dinner and I cried and cried, and said to Jesse,  "Now, I look like a jack o' lantern!"

5)   I can't remember if Tina was the one who also suggested bobby pins to hold on my covering.  Those also slide right out of my hair.  Imagine a 2yo girl with thin, see through hair.  That's mine.

6)   Sarah, I checked on the Nioxin product suggestion and it really isn't THAT expensive *IF* it works!   I've tried Rogaine, but I simple didn't have hair from the beginning (of my life) and it works on stimulating unproductive hair roots. 

I also have to be careful of products that mess with my hormones because I'm taking pills to suppress my hormones, which, in turn, suppress cancer cells from growing again.

       
                                   Our neighbor's tree.  It will soon be a fire red color.

7)   Lori, taking a picture of my bookshelves before moving them - an EXCELLENT IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I'll do that.  I think I did that with the family gallery of pictures in our long bedroom hallway, when we painted. 

     I will take pictures of the bookshelves AND the china cabinet.  I'm not sure HOW I've managed to balance the stuff in those two places.  Both the shelves and china cabinet contain things that are stuck in their and fit together like jigsaw puzzle pieces!!

 
Luci's picture.  That girl can never keep her clothes on her shoulders.   This is a typical picture of how she looks!

I'm happy to post the children's finger painting art work of fall trees. 

I even tried my hand (no pun intended!!! LOL!!!) at finger painting a picture!

                     
                                                                  Mom's tree!  

I'm going back tomorrow for another one of those epidural procedures on my neck.  I hope it works this time.  I'm still wondering about taking any anesthetic at all.  Since the last one didn't work in the surgery room, maybe I can tough it out and not have the after effect headaches.  Then again, the procedure itself could have been what produced the headaches! 

                 
                                                              Rissy's tree.
                                 The smear on the right is a shadow.  Good eye! 

We got a call, yesterday morning, that Jesse's dad was declining rapidly.  The nursing home had told my mother in law to get there quickly.  He is stabilized today, still not in good condition, and they are guessing at what the problem could be.  We've decided to go ahead with my Wednesday surgical procedure.  Jesse's sister is scheduled for surgery on Monday.  We both need this stuff done and are proceeding ahead as planned.

Prayers are always welcome.  I'm especially praying major back surgery isn't necessary. 

We bought a new (HARD) mattress on Saturday and picked it up Sunday.  We're having to get used to the hardness (it's almost like a pad on a hard floor), but we have both noticed our hips don't ache in the morning.  I'm still having the numbness in whatever (or both) arm I'm sleeping on when I wake up (which is several times a night).  We'll see if the surgery and the "chiropractic" bed make a difference.

 
                                                                      Annamarie's tree.     

I have errands to run today - need to pick up a few groceries and need to return library books.  Stephanie is taking the girls tonight and we'll get them tomorrow evening. She will be with me Thursday and Friday if I need her.  Probably will.  I canceled the cleaning lady today - I needed the time slot she would be here to use for the errands. 

Can't remember If I mentioned that we also picked out new carpeting.  Got a good price that became even cheaper, and will have the whole house done instead of only the front of the house.  Still don't know when we'll plan the installation. 

One step at a time.

     
                                    Rissy and Annamarie, on a lazy Saturday morning!
                                                    They are both getting so big!

I know God will see us through all of these surgical decisions that need to be made and will also get us through the winter months, when there is no work for Jesse.    We continue to thank God and praise Him each day. 

I love watching the hearts of my children turn to God and grasp a better understanding of Him, as they begin their own relationship with Him. 

Enjoy the rest of the week - I'll be back as soon as I'm able to post again.

Be Blessed  ~

October is such a beautiful month in Oklahoma.  The leaves are changing colors and a few leaves have begun to drop from the trees.  The temperatures consist of warm days (in the low to mid eighties) and at night it turns chilly. 

It's all just a tease of the cold weather that will come after Thanksgiving and hang around until some time in April.

                            
                                                                               Picture #2

Everything is rocking along at a steady pace right now.  The neighborhood children are on fall break today (through the weekend).  Much to the delight of my three children, I cut the school lessons short this morning and let the girls go outside to play. 

                          
                                                                     Picture #3

I'll most likely only have them do their spelling exams, their oral reading, and a page or two of language and math for the rest of this week.  Nothing much.  I kinda like the whole idea of a fall break, and I'm enjoying being finished with school lessons before lunch time!

                           
                                                                       Picture #4

Last Friday, true to my word, I put on a CD of Bach - a narration of his life and some of his musical compositions in the background. 

I pulled out the tempura paints, filled little cups with fall colors and gave the girls a large sheet of paper as a practice sheet.  They were told to make fall trees, dotting the leaves with their fingertips in fall colors and using long fingertip strokes for the trunk and limbs.  Their final pictures were painted on a smaller size piece of poster board.  It all turned out nicely and nothing horrible happened with the paints.  I have a vinyl snowman tablecloth that's older than the hills and there the remnants of our fall project have left their mark!

The girls wore their "mostly worn out" play dresses to paint.  I know it's supposed to wash out, but I didn't want to take a chance. 

Luci cracks me up with the little rear end "problem."  Her and granddaughter, JanaLyn, always have problems with their clothes riding up on one side!  I don't know how they can stand it!

Yesterday Rissy took some pictures of me.

 
   
                                                                            Rissy

AND MY HAIR!!!  I needed to update my profile picture and I thought people would like to see it and how it's grown.  This time last year, I was bald!  Maybe a few whiskers of hair, but basically bald.

                              
                                                                    Picture #5

It's difficult for me to wear a headcovering everyday, because my hair is so fine and thin.  The snap clips that hold the cloth on my head tend to make my hair break off.  Despite all the new growth, I already see short pieces that have broken.  It just makes me sick to have hair that is brand new and already ruined. 

                        
                                                                     Picture #6

I usually cover when I go out in public, and always for church.  But, I get home and take the clips out and scratch my head to get the blood circulating again.  Then, I leave my head open to the air.  I stopped by someone's house to drop off a meal, a few weeks ago, and they didn't know who was standing at their door.  No one usually sees my hair!

                               
                                                                        Picture #7

I dry it with a brush (to straighten the tight little ringlets, I've always had) and I haven't cut or trimmed my hair. It's grown, naturally, into a nice layered shape.  Still have that bald spot at the back & top of my head.  I've always had thin hair there, and now (with age, I guess) the crown is so thin, you can see my scalp.

My dining room table is a wrapping network.  Paper, boxes, and ribbon strung out all over the place. 

Our second oldest daughter's birthday is next Monday and I've been busy wrapping gifts for her.  Since I can't be on my feet long or bend over like I used to, I had to take one block of time to put the gifts in tissue paper and boxes, then again to decorate the gift sacks with tissue and ribbon, then I wrapped a few boxes.  I still have a couple of boxes to wrap and decorate with bows, then I'll be finished. 

I chose all silver and an icy blue, this year.  I love looking at (and buying) different/new paper and ribbon. 

This year; Jesse, the 3 youngest daughters, and I all shopped together for Nikki's gifts.  It was fun and I was glad Jesse was involved and made some choices regarding what gifts were purchased.

                               
                                                                      Picture #8

Jesse called me , while I was typing this post, and said we are definitely getting new carpeting.  An off white (maybe champagne?) color, we picked out last weekend.  He asked if I wanted the whole house done, instead of just the front rooms and hallway.  Without a moment of hesitation, I said, "Sure!"

       
                                                                             Picture #9

Now I need to figure out where to put all the heavy stuff the day they install the carpeting! 

We have that new fish tank (I wish it was on wheels, but it's not) and the china cabinet is full of breakables that will have to be emptied.  The garage may be the best place to put up tables and hold the china cabinet contents during the installation.  Then, ALL of my bookshelves, I just arranged, will have to be emptied!

Our king size bed is heavy, but Annamarie's king bed is UNBELIEVABLY heavy! 

When Jesse called about the carpet news, I asked if I could buy a plane ticket to California and stay with my mom, while this all happened here at home.  Without a moment of hesitation, he said, "NO!"

                             
                                                                          Picture #10

I started a new book last night.  Another one about the Civil War - specifically the battle fought in Franklin, TN.  I've already finished half of the book.  It was *that* good!  I had to put another battery in my reading light because I used up all the power, staying up late to read.  Last night, I had quite a bit of trouble falling asleep (neck pain) and read to distract myself.

I have a few things left on my "To Do" list today.  I need to divide the large quantities of meat we bought on Monday into smaller portions for the freezer, I need to take a bath before church tonight, and I need to finish the sheets I'm washing.

Then . . . I THINK I'LL READ some more in my book!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, which picture do you think I should use for my profile pic?  I like picture #8, but also like the black and white version, picture #10. 

Be Blessed  ~

She woke up this morning without her little friend!

We had a nice surprise last night.

Granddaughter, JanaLyn, got to spend the evening playing with the girls. 

She and Stephanie came over for dinner.  As soon as everyone had eaten, JanaLyn was off down the hall to play with the girls and our "little" dog, Little Bit.  Sushi is still a bit too much for her, size-wise.

When it was time for the girls to read (they have to read each night for 30 minutes), JanaLyn jumped right into the routine and found books to read on her reading level.

She likes to do what "the girls" do, and fits right in with the rest of them!

Rissy was there (ever the teacher) to help her with the hard words.

Stephanie found Little Bit snuggled up to JanaLyn and asked me to get a picture of the two of them.

In this next picture, JanaLyn's face resembles mine so very much (when I was a child). 

This is the picture Stephanie wants me to copy, so she can frame it.  Sweet dog and sweet little girl!!!!!!!!!!!
        

For dinner, I made some sirloin steak pieces, white rice, broccoli, and served bread & butter.  We only had a bit of broccoli left afterward!  We had French vanilla pudding with fresh strawberries on top for dessert.  Yum!  A bunch of hearty eaters.  JanaLyn said, "I love Granny"s cooking!"

Right before JanaLyn and Sephanie had to leave, I played some hymns on the piano.  JanaLyn came out - in awe.  She's never heard me play (since I haven't played in 20 years!)   I promised she could come back and I would teach her a few things.  I helped her play (with one finger) "Doe a Deer."  Stephanie commented it had been a LONG time since I'd played. 

I was so proud of my 3 younger girls.  As I played old (VERY OLD) hymns, they sang right along.  I'm glad they have learned some of the older songs!

Yesterday, while grocery shopping at Wal-Mart, I bought baby gifts for two girls.  One, I go to church with (her shower is Saturday - a brunch) and the other is a friend of Stephanie's, who THOUGHT she was having a girl and was surprised by a baby boy. 

All of the soft fuzzy clothing and the newer colors in baby clothes made me wish I had thousands of dollars to spend.  Just so sweet.  Not sweet enough to want another one for *me*, but sweet, nonetheless!!!!

I'm just sick.  I got a new sweater that has some wool and cashmere in it.  I washed it in a garment bag.  When I took it out, there were small holes in it - like it had been eaten by moths.  It's one of the nicest sweaters I've ever had and was brand new. 

Looking at it through Pollyanna eyes, I'm fortunate in that I know how to darn socks and will be able to patch it, once I find a matching color from my cross stitch box of threads.  But, I'm so angry with myself.  I'm not even sure what I did.  It said machine wash cold on a gentle cycle, and I did just that  . .

Oh  well......  it's not to die over!

Jesse just got home.  3:15pm is early for him. 

You can tell there isn't much "grass cutting" to be done these days. 

He's doing a lot of hedge trimming, etc.

That's all the news from my neck of the woods.

I pray each of you has a wonderful weekend of rest and a sweet Lord's day with church friends.

Be Blessed  ~

Dummy me, I think, "I wonder if that's a sonic boom?"  

Of course, there was no sound and I quickly realized my stupidity. 

Then chills ran though me, as I remembered the sensation of the building shaking when downtown Oklahoma City was bombed, April 19th.  I paused, reluctantly went to the window that faced downtown, looked to see if there was smoke rising in the sky and did a 360° to see if smoke was ANYwhere.  

There wasn't. 

By now, the girls are discussing arguing among themselves *WHO* slammed a door and rocked the house. 

That's when the thought hit me,

"I wonder if we just had an earthquake?" 

I'm no stranger to them, having grown up in the San Francisco Bay Area, and I had a vaguely familiar sensation within me.  We have frequent earthquakes in cities around us, and most people don't know it.  They are so low 1.something, or 2.something, on the Richter scale.  The news usually reports what only a few people feel.

I turned on the T.V. in time to hear the local newsmen saying,

"We just experienced an unconfirmed earthquake of a 5.4 magnitude.  Details to follow." 

WOW!  

That's a big earthquake and, for Oklahoma, it's an off the records unusual event!!    

I told my girls to remember the day and we would study (sometime soon) what makes an earthquake happen. 

I want them to never forget, what I hope to be, a one time experience for them.  

I felt just about everything they did (just stung a lot) and when they asked me to get into the wheelchair to go to recovery, I asked if I really needed the chair, because I was not impaired   Of course they made me get in it.

We drove home, and I began to get drowsy (FINALLY!) when we were almost here.  I slept for several hours after arriving here.  A LITTLE LATE!

The drug used for anesthesia has given me a horrible migraine (a side effect in less that 1% of patients - here we go again!) and the dose of steroid has also given me flu-like body aches.

I've taken a migraine pill to alleviate the worst of the headache, but I just feel achy all over.

Please pray for relief from these side effects. I would really appreciate prayers.

Also, quick note for now, the first words the surgeon said was I was really very close to needing major surgery on my back.  The degeneration is "very bad to severe," HIS words.  BUT, he also said my cancer recovery was AMAZING and none of what he was looking at was due to cancer damage.  So, YAY! for that piece of good news!

He gave me a neck brace apparatus you blow up to gradually stretch your neck - a type of traction to be used for a short time daily, and I'm sure that will make me feel a ton better - WHEN I'm able to start using it.

Be Blessed  ~

CHERYLYN

I haven't mentioned this in the past - fear, I think.

I have decided to undergo a procedure this coming Wednesday morning.  I'll admit, I'm afraid of the procedure, in fact, I initially refused it with a hearty, "No thanks!":

If I didn't think the risk (which they say is not high) was less than my physical problems, I wouldn't choose this route.

They are using a guided image (referencing my last MRI pictures) and going into the area by my spinal cord and injecting steroids and something else.  I'm a person who chose natural childbirth over an epidural because of the fear of having a needle near my spinal cord.

I have had a growing numbness in both arms, from the elbows down to my fingertips.  At this point, I wake up numb, gradually regain feeling, but NOT in the tips of my fingers.  According to my last MRI report of my cervical (neck) vertebrae, I have pressure that causes pain and numbness. 

The truth is, I have pain all up and down my back, but I'm not having this procedure done (not anywhere else, that is) to alleviate any  pain.  I simply want to regain feeling in my fingers, and less pain and numbness at night. 

The numbness also occurs when I read a book with my elbows bent, or it happens when I talk on the phone (even *IF* I change from one hand to the other) with my arms bent.

I will be put to sleep in surgery (I'm happy about that) at a "Spine Hospital" - which makes me feel more confident.  You know?  Like they do this procedure all the time, and they should be pretty good at it!! 

They've already told me I will be "tender" and may feel worse for 1 - 6 days AFTER the procedure.  Oh well, at least they were honest.

On Thursday, whether I feel good or not, I HAVE to go to the cancer place for my monthly bone IV AND visit with the P.A. (my oncologist is still on maternity leave) for a routine 3 month check up.

Okay - enough of that info. 

If I don't have a chance to write on Xanga anymore this week (I Have a long "To Do" list!), I would appreciate prayers Wednesday and for the rest of the week.

Stephanie (our oldest) is watching the girls while I'm in surgery.  Jesse is taking off Wednesday and Thursday and my church has already inquired about help with meals.  I know I'm in good hands - not the hands of men, but in God's hands, the best place to be!

                 *********************************************************

Even though the leaves on our trees aren't quite ready to express fall colors, our clothing has taken a major turn.

We're packing up the rest of the short sleeves and light summer colors.

      
And, we are sifting through the attic storage bins of warmer clothing, trying to figure out who can wear what, this year.

Just as I suspected, Luci is making out like a bandit in the clothes department and I'm SO GLAD I've bought Annamarie a bunch of sweaters and skirts.

My wonderful seamstress (for years and years) has been called to a ministry of helping couples and will no longer have time to sew or to alter my "too big" dresses.  I didn't know this when I set out shopping for me and the girls in thrift stores and on Ebay a month ago.  God certainly led me and prepared me ahead of time!

                       
My closet reflects the fall and winter colors and has been recently cleaned.  I mean REALLY cleaned!!!  The shelves, to the right in the picture, have also been cleaned out. 

I had needed to work on the shelves 2 years ago and then when I was diagnosed with cancer (and all that unlovely stuff) last year, the disarray of the shelves was left for a future date.

It looks fantastically organized, now, and I even rearranged the hanging clothes on the rods. 

Now, I have a few short sleeves and pastel colored things left, but, they will soon go to the attic with their "friends!"

                      ****************************************************************************

I've been busy in the den, too.

We've swung the sofa and love seat on an angle to the TV.  It's better in the winter if we are not so close to the windows.

This way, we are facing the fireplace, too. 

Jesse said he didn't want to buy wood to heat the front of the house, so the girls and I will be wearing our new sweaters and enjoying an occasional fire with the little bit of wood we have leftover from last year.

           
Another reason for the switch in furniture position was to make sure Tango (the cockatiel) is away from the windows.  She won't get any sun in her new spot, but she won't have a cold chill or breeze blowing on her, either.  The fish have a heater, so they'll be fine.

Our windows LITERALLY blow air if you sit by them in the winter.  We may have to resort to heavy plastic on the windows.  I hate to block out the clear view - it makes the house feel more open, but it may save on the electric bill.  We just can't afford windows in this house.  I think I once counted something like 24 windows in here!

AND, we need carpeting before we buy even a few replacement windows!

                 ***************************************************************************

Jesse took us out to lunch after church, today.  Nothing fancy.  "Golden Corral" buffet. 

I love to try a little bit of all their different salad items each time I go.  I don't make carrot raisin slaw or any other unusual, "fancy" salads at home. 

I had a really good, but small-ish, piece of sirloin steak and some hot wheat rolls that were delicious. 

And, of course, a taste of 3 different chocolate desserts!

              
                 That means I didn't cook dinner tonight.  The girls enjoyed popcorn for their dinner!!
                             Rissy's mouth was full, or should would have smiled with her teeth!

                ********************************************************************************

I have a major grocery trip to make, tomorrow.  Jesse told me not to go October 1st since it would be too crowded.  My nervous system is definitely not as strong as it used to be.  Crowds tend to make me jumpy.

We also need to go to the library to return books and pick up some holds.  I figure it might be nice to lie around and read some books for a few days. 

The girls have a huge history test tomorrow - a first for them.  They've studied their history book this weekend preparing for THE BIG DAY!!!  LOL!.  AND, I had to give Luci and Annamarie another spelling test today, because they didn't make a high enough grade on Friday.  In our school, if you don't make at least 80%, you get to take the test over AFTER you have studied!  Both of them did much better on today's test!!!

I have 92 million phone calls to make tomorrow morning.  Nothing can wait until next week, and, since I'm not sure how long I'll feel bad . . .

                            
                                                                       Annamarie

I am planning to go to our local Christian bookstore tomorrow or Tuesday.  A real sweet young girl in church lost her mother yesterday.  She is so grief stricken, she sobbed through the entire service.  Everyone felt so bad for her. 

Our next door neighbor's sister died suddenly yesterday. 

AND . . . two women in church are having a rough time.  I'm going to pick up some cards and maybe a couple bookmarks for each of them. 

A sweet, young friend who goes to the church the girls and I attend on Wednesday nights, may need help with a meal this week.  She lives only a few blocks from me.  If I was younger, I could easily walk to her house with the food!

As long as I can do something to be helpful BEFORE Wednesday, I'll be just fine and will enjoy staying busy!

                     ****************************************************************

All the bad news and hardships in everyone's lives! 

So sorry.  I didn't mean for that to happen; but, I don't really have the time to edit this and end with something more cheery!

How about this

Oh well, that was supposed to come across bigger, but I don't have the time to mess with that, either!!!!!!!
 

Be Blessed  ~