July 14, 2009

• One of Those Days & Nights

  We're up early this morning, hoping for a better day than yesterday. 

  After seeing Karen off at the airport (where she had to drag her own luggage to the desk, because sky cap jobs have been eliminated!!!!!!),  JoAnn returned with a headache.  Either, circumstances, excessive heat, lack of sleep, or a combination of all of the above, produced a throbbing pain in her head.  She took some Excedrin, cola, and a short nap in her room.  Then, awoke to Abreeana crying miserably from pain.

                                
                                My bed is empty, and the loveseat Luci slept on is, too.

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  Abreeana has been suffering with diarrhea for over a week.  We thought it was beginning to clear up and were waiting for her mother to contact the Washington doctor and mail us a prescription.  It never arrived and the stomach problem has continued to plague the poor little thing.  Yesterday, as tired and achy as JoAnn felt, she had to deal with mouth sores in Abreeana's mouth.  We're talking some MAJOR pain in that poor itty bitty mouth.  She wailed and wailed and I felt so very sorry for her.  Between stomach pains and mouth sores - she's been miserable.  She allowed her sister, Aolani, to hold her while I plied her with shavings of peppermint candy.  I know how important it is to keep liquids down her, and she just couldn't do it last night.  EVERYTHING causes her pain.

                                                

  After calling around and finding the best way to handle a doctor visit and what "medicine/food" to use until she could get in to see someone, I made the decision to call (early this morning) the girls' doctor's office.  Sure enough, they have agreed to see her at 11:30am this morning for cash.  JoAnn doesn't have medical permission to treat Abreeana, nor does Oklahoma accept the medical insurance carried on Abreeana in Washington.  What a mess!  The girls' doctor will discount the bill since it will be paid the same day and cash will be used.  THEN, hopefully, Abreeana will get some relief.  I remember having those mouth sores back in February, when I first when to the doctor for the lump in my breast.  The doctor was more worried about my mouth sores than the other problem!  They were horrible open, bloody-looking sores - the same as Abreeana.  I remember that even applesauce burned when I swallowed.

  ===================

                                     
                                          JoAnn and her grandchildren are up and outta bed.

  Everyone is out of bed - animals included.  I didn't sleep well last night, nor did JoAnn.  She was up with Abreeana who kept crying to her about her, "mouth, mouth" in her sleep.

      Sampson's bed.                                                                Sushi's crate bed.
   

  ==============

  I was restless and felt like crying last night.  So, JoAnn was worried about me, too.  She came in at midnight and I told her there was nothing more she could do for me.  I told her she should go back to bed.  She said she got up around 4am this morning and I was asleep - but moaning in my sleep.  She has had her hands full between Abreeana and me - for sure!  Who would EVER sign up for this job???!!!!

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  I'm not sure what will happen with the girls visiting Stephanie this week.  Annamarie came in from the pool yesterday complaining of an ear ache and Rissy confirmed that Annamarie had told her that her ear was aching, again.  I guess Annamarie will be the one to stay home from Stephanie's this time.  I can't take a chance on her ear problems flaring up again, as HER ears have been giving her so many problems this year.

                                                
                                                Rissy and Annamarie slept in Annamarie's king bed last night
                                                                                              - they're up and around this morning.

  =================

  I don't know what's up with me, either.  Why the restlessness, yesterday???  I teared up and was weepy, much of yesterday afternoon.  I was mainly missing my friend Lori something fierce.  She was here this summer (for a short visit on a Sunday afternoon) and sat on my bed with me, while we talked and held hands.  That memory was burning a hole through my mind all day, yesterday, and I wanted Lori by me, more than anything.  I was afraid to call her and start crying - afraid she would think something bad was going on with me.  I didn't want to scare her. 

  Fortunately, God urged her to call me last night and we talked for close to an hour - which helped a lot (hearing her voice).  I still want to see her and hate the miles between us.  She is one of those girlfriends who's a comfort to me and always has the right thing to say or the right silly joke to tell. 

  I love her oodles and gobs - which (translated) means a whole lot!

                 
                      Rissy's bedding needs to be washed, now that Karen is gone
                                           - the only bed that's made this morning.

  ====================

  I'm not sure that some of my medication isn't the culprit that is making me feel so melancholy. 

  The doctors and nurses said all of the chemo drugs can cause depression; but, it isn't *depression* I'm feeling.  More like an antsy, "I gotta break outta here" feeling.  I've done so well up to this point - sitting inside these four  walls day after day.  Everyone keeps shooing me back into the main part of the house from the garage and backyard. 

  I'm not supposed to get overheated or be exposed to the sun (thanks to steroids), so I can understand their concern over my being outside. 

  But, the 1500sq ft garage is like an extension of our house (not used as a garage for our cars) - pantry, craft storage, extra pots, pans, and appliances, etc.  I'm out there quite a few times a day.  I feel like I'm escaping from prison, once I set foot over that extended threshold into my extra 1500 sq ft!!!!  I guess everyone has my best interest at heart, but I sometimes miss companionship and fresh air!!!

  The pain medicine could be making me feel restless, too.  I suspect that is more the cause of my melancholy, than the usual chemo therapy stuff I have been receiving.

                              
                                 Aolani will go to her dad's house to visit him, today.

  ==============

  At any rate, I feel like we're all up out of bed and *I* have no where to go.  If Jesse can't come home when JoAnn leaves for the doctor with Abreeana, I'll have to do the "wise thing" and stay on my bed with a book.  This time, the chemo hasn't made me have as many black-out experiences.  However, I've been very careful to not bend over and stand up too quickly - nor have I jumped out of bed without dangling my feet first. 

  Dangling my feet  first . . . a new way of life!

                                     
                                      The three girly munchkins trying to wake up in the den.

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  Someone from church brought dinner last night - Laura.  I haven't seen her since I stopped going to a Christian child raising class through the church.  A group of us were watching a video and discussing the topics regarding our own children.  It was really enjoyable and nice to be with "big people" - and NICE ONES, too!  The meetings were held at her house each week.  It's been last February, I think, since I've seen her.  She didn't stay long - but the visit was really nice for me.

  I'm sounding pretty boring and depressed here - at least that's what I think when I read over what I've typed - so, I'm going to get off of here and see what trouble I can get into before JoAnn leaves for the doctor!

  Be Blessed  ~

  • 11:38 am
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