Month: December 2008

  • Lots of Pictures Day

    So much happened yesterday!  I tried very hard to take pictures.  In fact, I left the camera out on my desk and Istill* missed some fun things.  If you hate pictures, this isn't a post you'll want to sit through!

    I think on The Today's Show were characters from a new Broadway play, "Shrek."  The girls stood silently mesmerized by real people dressed as Shrek characters.  I guess this is the "Princess" (???).  I wondered why it was so quiet and took my camera with me to check things out!  Looking at them standing so still reminded me of "When Time Stood Still" . . . (LOL)

    I came back to my desk and found Stormy standing on a pillow and "loving" my living room chair with her little face. 

    Over and over again she rubbed her cheeks and neck on the chair!
     


    You really had to be there to get the giggle we had when she was caught "loving" the chair - totally oblivious to our presence!

     

    Now, I know for sure it's true.  Cats love chairs and table legs as much as they love humans!!!  The reality of that fact breaks my heart!!!

    This is the next place I found Stormy. 

    I had to check out what she was looking at and BOY was *I* surprised!

    Snow!  My pictured don't do the swirling white stuff justice.  It was VERY windy and the flakes were dry powder swirling all over the place.
     

    It didn't stick to much of anything, but you can see a little on the roof's shingles.

    I really L-O-V-E these next pictures.  I'm a bird lover, it's true.  But, when I saw them eating in the freezing cold and thought of how God said (and WAS) providing for them, I thought of Chirper and how I continue to pray for God to keep him healthy.  I thought, "If He'll feed the sparrows and cares about them, He absolutely cares about Chirper."  So, I was very moved seeing these little creatures in the icy cold eating from my patio.
     




    You can't have a cold day without having hot chocolate . . .  RIGHT???  Swiss Miss, to be exact!

    I was aghast to find I was at the bottom of the barrel with no other new can in the pantry supply!!!  There was enough for 3 cups and maybe one more.
     

    Luci was having trouble behaving yesterday (again) so she became "my buddy" for the day.  She prodded and begged me to finished decorating our garland and I managed to get the "red stuff" up.  Today, I will finish with the "white stuff" because my arms just refused to reach above my head another minute!  I "AM" supposed to still be taking it easy.  I feel so much better.  Just a trace of that achiness in my shoulders and neck.  Werid bug - whatever it was!

    Here are before and after pictures and I'll post the final product another day.

    The doorway to the bedroom hall.  And the top center.  Those are white doves at the top.
     

    Next is the Sampson's hallway.  And, the top center.
       

    Then there is our formal dining room doorway that goes into the den.  And, top center.
     

    Last of all is the fireplace mantel.  And the center of it.
     

    It all looks really nice when the lights are on in the evening.  I still have white berries, white geraniums I've cut into small blooms, and some greenery frosted with white "snow" to add to the greenery.  Like I said, I'll post pictures of the finally product which will, HOPEFULLY, happen today!

    Stephanie had to work late and she asked if Rob could bring JanaLyn here to spend the night.  Stephanie is terrified of driving in the most minor of bad weather, and there truly were a lot of car wrecks due to slick roads.  So, I guess JanaLyn is playing hooky from school today!  Cause she's here and not there!

    This is what she looked like when she arrived last night!  Dressed (not in a nightgown) and so cute!  The dots in the antlers light up and flash!  Too funny!

    Jesse is off work today.  He left early this morning to take his mother to the hospital for some out patient procedure and he is already back home.  Because of him being home, my "To Do" list is subject to change!  But, here it is:

    To Do List:
    *  Wash one child's clothes and JanaLyn's winter coat
    *  Pull something from the freezer for dinner
    *  Teach an hour of school (including JanaLyn)
    *  Finish the "white stuff" in the garland
    *  Maybe change the sheets on our bed, since Jesse is home.

    I STILL need to straighten my desk.  It hasn't been done since I first needed to do it AND more papers have piled up.

    Be blessed  ~


  • It's Only Tuesday??!!

    I suppose when you are without "spunk" time seems to stand eternal.  It's only Tuesday, but feels more like a Thursday.  Go figure!

    Yesterday, I stayed pretty much true to what I promised Jesse.  I didn't over tax myself.  I did Luci's laundry and found my dresses that were missing and my sweats, which I washed.  Doing daily laundry usually isn't an option, or I get too far behind.  Luci started off causing trouble with turning off the TV (again!), and she was soon banished from her sisters and was made to be my shadow for the day.  It went well - that arrangement.

    My missing fall/winter dresses cleaned and on hangers.

     That would be Jesse's laundry basket in the doorway!  See what I mean?  Laundry and cooking are an everyday occurrence at out house!  See how thoughtful Jesse is?  He provide hangers with his dirty clothes!!!  I don't know if he is aware of it, but more times than not, he FOLDS his dirty clothes before placing them in the basket!!!  Cracks me up!

    Also, yesterday, I tried to watch "Wall-E" again with the girls.  I told them if we hurried and did our chores we could watch it in my bedroom cozied up on the big bed.  I'm just glad Rissy didn't grab the camera to take pictures of me!!!  She spent most of the time poking me in the ribs with her elbow or jiggling my arm to wake me up.  I was so drowsy.  This is the second time I have tried to watch it and couldn't stay awake.  Poor Wall-E!!!!

     
    I didn't get very far with the decorating, I wasn't really trying to concentrate on it.  However, I managed to wash the dining room table cloth (covered with Aunti Louise's Pink Goo at the places where each child sat on Thanksgiving!), get it back on the table and put our centerpiece out - candles and all.

    It's made from a pre-decorated wreath I bent and reshaped into a "marquise diamond" design.  Then I embellished it with berries and pine cones.  The two birds are shimmery, but I had trouble catching the glistening shimmer.  From beak to tail, they are sprinkled with some sort of clear glitter.
     

    I do the same thing (pretty much) year after year.  Everything is stored together and just too easy to not repeat.   
     

    The girls were excited to see it and oohs and ahhs were heard as they walked past the table.  I think we lead such a plain and dull life that *any* change evokes comments!

    While working on the centerpiece, I looked up (a BIG no-no!) and saw the dust on the chandelier.  Considering my lack of concern for cleaning anything other than the basics right now, I will dust it rather than "clean" it!
     
    The chandelier has dozens of little teardrop shaped prisms hanging and each should be taken down and dipped in amonia and water.  The color is clear, but to capture each of the prisms, I had to use no flash and that created an amber look, but it gives you a greater appreciation of WHY I don't feel like cleaning each individual piece of glass, drying it, and reattaching it to the base!!!  I think my Swiffer Duster Wand will do a good enough job!

    Everyone is trying to stay warm today.  South winds (over 40mph) blew in a real live thunder storm last night.  We had lightening and the whole nine yards!  The wind shifted to a northerly one and now cold air is pouring in and: IF I THOUGHT THE HOUSE WAS DRAFTY YESTERDAY! . . . !!!

    I found Rissy and Luci, but couldn't find Annamarie this morning.

    Rissy is showing Luci how to work her (Rissy's) CD player.

    LOL!  I found Annamarie as soon as I snapped these two playing.  I told you, Annamarie loves having her picture taken!

    Annamarie has one of our old cassette players that still works!  When I was looking for children, Annamarie was under the blanket hiding!

    Our doggie, Sampson, was snug in his bed.  An electric blanket - unplugged!  He's still in Jesse's closet these days!

    Stormy came to the kitchen doorway and camped out when Rissy went to the kitchen.


    Crazed person that I am, I gave permission for Rissy to bake something without my help this morning!

    Guess who else was wanting to eat???  That's Stormy coming out and Chirper going into the cupboard that has their cans of food!

    Stormy saw me and left immediately, but Chirper (who isn't afraid of me!!) stayed while Rissy began to mix things up.

    Either I was snoring too loud or Jesse's leg had shooting pains again because I found his "sofa bed" after he left for work.  Our formal living room sofa!  The guest room (for the foster children) is still empty, so I'm guessing it was leg pain and not my snoring that bothered him.
     


    Speaking of foster children . . . we still haven't heard back from the gal who was supposed to come last Wednesday for us to sign off on our completed home study.  I've check with our references we gave and they have said no one has called them again.  (scatching my head ???)

    I taught "homeschool" from my bed before we watched (or "attempted to watch") "Wall-E" yesterday afternoon.  I figured their attention span might be better if a movie was the reward at the end of my teaching!  They DID ask questions and had more fun.  I threw a couple tongue twisters at them and they laughed and laughed!

    I had a nice surprise late in the afternoon.  There was a knock on the door and I could see someone (through the slits in the blinds) leaving our porch.  I knew that meant "a delivery" but remembered nothing I had ordered. 

    Books!
     
    Books for lil' ol' ME!!!!!  Who would have thought???!!! 
    Since I had forgotten ordering them, it was a grand surprise!!!!

    Today's TO DO List:
    *  Jesse's laundry (since it's sitting, so politely, by the washer!)
    *  Clean desk top???  (didn't get to it yesterday)
    *  Prepare several boxes for mailing
    *  Oh!  Yeah!  It would be good if I took something out of the freezer for dinner tonight!
    *  AND, I still need to find that holiday stationery and compose letters  (my printer is acting up, so, we'll see!)
    *  MAYBE put a sprig or two of berries in my garland (surely a little bit each day will "git 'er done" quicker!)

    I don't believe I'll offer to watch "Wall-E" again.  Falling asleep twice tells me it might not be *the* movie for me!! LOL

    Guess that's all my lofty thoughts and ideas for today!

    Be blessed  ~

  • Blustery Monday

    To say it's windy is an understatement.  Remember, I live in Oklahoma "where the wind comes sweeping down the plain . .  . " 

    I took these pictures yesterday when we were coming back from Jesse and Sharon's (sil) birthday lunch.  They were doing road construction on I-40 and the traffic was limited to one (VERY CROWDED) lane.  So, we detoured by driving through down town.

    Large flags don't blow straight out unless there is a nice hefty wind helping to straighten the fabric!
     
    What you *can't* see is the pole that holds the traffic light was also swaying in the wind.  It's no surprise the flag is shredded on its edges!

    Today is even worse.  Today's wind is blowing eerie sounds through our windows and door frames.  You can feel the draft throughout the house.  We really MUST get this house sealed up better - but that costs money - and then there is the price of groceries . . . gasoline . . . property taxes due at the end of this month . . . and, everything else . . .

    I had a bad night Friday night.  Aches and horrible chills.  My teeth were chattering so much I thought the sound would wake up Jesse.  I felt okay Saturday; but, only had energy to do nothing.  The girls wanted me to watch "Wall-E" with them, I agreed, and the girls and JanaLyn and I piled into the den and I promptly fell asleep.  I sleep for about 2 hours.  In fact, I slept so deeply I dreamed!  I woke up to a dark house and Rissy telling the girls to get out of the kitchen so she could fix dinner!  Yikes!  I wasn't THAT out of it!  I stumbled through making dinner and began to feel whooped.

    I slept okay Saturday night and felt okay when we went to meet family in the "in-between-city" for the big birthday lunch.  I don't recall feeling anything but fine.

    We got home took off our coats and I felt INCREDIBLY TIRED.  Jesse was watching football in our bedroom stretch cross-wise on our bed.  I asked him to move over, I laid on my back to rest and slept for several hours, again.  I woke up feeling horrible.  Body aches and chills again.  This time, it was worse than Friday night.

    I know the air is dry and the house drafty with all of this wind.  Even the cats are finding blankets to cuddle up in comfort.  This is how we found Stormy when we returned from the restaurant!  Somehow, she managed to get under the blanket without the help of anyone!

    Luci insisted I take Stormy's picture, and Annamarie loves to nose her way into pictures I take!

    After, I woke up from my nap, here's who continued to sleep in my bed!

    That's Jesse's bearded face on the striped pillow, Luci in the gold dress, and Chirper, snuggled up warm in the bed!

    I don't know why, but soon after my nap, yesterday, I became chilled and stiff again.  I took my temperature this time and, sure enough, I had a small fever.  I NEVER get fevers and the slightest elevation makes me feel crummy.  I turned the electric blanket on, could barely lift my arms out of my dress's sleeves without lots of pain, and COULD NOT GET WARM.  I slept in a flannel nightgown wearing my leggings and socks.  I took 3 ibuprofen at 5:30 and called the pharmacist to see if I would kill myself if I took a Darvocet for the shooting pains in my legs and arms.  He said it was safe.  I must have sounded like death because the pharmacist said, as we hung up, "Hang in there, okay?"  It was a rough evening of pain and chills.  I watched TV to take my mind off of my body.  I have NO symptoms of anything and can't imagine what my body is fighing off - some bug of some kind, I guess. 

    Yesterday, I told Jesse I didn't feel bad Saturday (day) but more like lazy and guilty.  Nothing got done except the china was finally put into the china cabinet and dishes loaded into the dishwasher.  I made lunch for the 4 girls (JanaLyn was here) and then fell asleep while they watched that movie.  I always feel guilty, like I *should* be doing *something* but I simply didn't have the energy.

    A good Xanga friend of mine suffers from fibromyalgia and I even went so far as to look that up online.  Doesn't sound like what's ailing me.  And, I don't usually feel like this.  I've felt more "stiff" this colder season than usual, and I've chalked it up to being 55yo instead of 25yo!!

    Jesse pretty much told me to "lay low" today and not try to do anything.  I should at least clean up my desk, since I can do that sitting down.  He took meat out last night for today's dinner - simple stuff, like sausage and hot links.  I'm afraid of a bill that needs to be paid getting lost in the stacks that have accumulated.  Stacks don't take long to manifest on my desk - it's truly amazing!

    To Do List:
    *  Divide those 4 boxes of cookies purchased on Friday & freeze!!!!
    *  Have the girls vacuum and dust
    *  Clean my desk top
    *  Hunt for my holiday stationery I purchased to send out as a "what's happened this year" letter
    *  Watch TV????

    I don't think I feel much like teaching school, unless I just read stories to them while reclined on the den's sofa.

    I'm chilly and stiff feeling a little bit today - too chilled and stiff to start a fire that would make the front of the house cozy!!!  Pretty lazy, huh?

    Alright!  I just read through this and I've done nothing except complain.  I'm sure everyone has heard enough from me!

    Be blessed  ~

  • Many Thanks

    My husband, Jesse, asked me to write a personal "Thank You!" to everyone who wished him a happy birthday last Thursday.  I think he was overwhelmed (or, at least, surprised) at how nice all of my friends were to someone they haven't gotten to know!

    It's hard to explain how all of us correspond about our daily lives with our families and how we see pictures that bring us even closer to each other!  Next best thing to being there!!!

    I am also grateful for all of you who continue to be of sweet encouragement to me and those who bring laughter into my life.  Your prayers are always appreciated!

    This is a BIG THANKS from Jesse, but not without me adding my two cents "thank you!", too!!!

  • Great Plans for the Week-End

    THIS IS THE FIRST DAY OF LIVING LIFE WITH  MY NEW RESOLVE (translated, that means "attitude")!

    I talked with the girls' therapist yesterday, showed her my blog and everyone's supportive comments.  First of all:  SHE thinks you are a great group of people.  "Wonderful friends!" is what you were called.  I think so, too.

    She listened while I purged myself of all the thoughts and feelings inside of me.  In the end, she reiterated again what she's told me 92 million times, "God gave Luci to the perfect mother for her.  There are only 2 other types of mothers that exist.  Those that beat and (sometimes) eventually kill their children and those that give the child everything she wants to keep her from screaming.  The second type (the "giver inner" type!) raises a self-centered, miserable adult who gets along with NO ONE.  Since I detest manipulation and can spot it a mile away (I was manipulated for most of my life), I'm the *perfect parent* for a manipulative child.  Because, I won't allow that behavior."  I guess that's like my good friend Lori K. who prayed for patience and said God sent her a set of twins to help her learn!!!  Telling Luci the other girls don't have to play with her because of the way she treats them, is a GOOD idea and I should continue to let Luci experience consequences.  The therapist said, AGAIN, I was doing everything right and by not *feeling* affection for Luci, didn't mean I didn't love her.  She said many parents actually visualize themselves doing something harmful to a *difficult to raise* child.  I can't say I've ever considered setting her in a trash can for the garbage man to pick up, but I DO recognize my feelings when they are close to being scary.  And, she said that's excellent because many people don't know when to remove themselves from a volatile situation.  I told her she could keep my blog about Luci and even show it to Luci's medical doctor.  I wanted it to be placed "on the record" that I was making myself accountable for my actions.  I'm not trying to hide the fact Luci sends me way over the top into frustration and anger, and I'm definitely not trying to portray the facade of a perfect Mommy (snicker! - perfect?).  She handed the "blog papers" back to me, and made a few notes in our family's file.

    I wouldn't have addressed this issue again, except many of you expressed curiosity about what the therapist would tell me.  My close friend, Tangi, also suggested I send Luci somewhere else to have her fits other than her bedroom or my own.  Someplace set apart for those screamin' meanies.  I've chosen my walk in closet.  Of course, I'm NOT closing the door, but she can sit in there where there is nothing exciting to look at, it IS carpeted with ventilation, it's more isolated, but still big enough for her to kick and scream without destroying anything.  She's already been there once today. 

    And, she has been made to sit in "time in" by my desk chair.  If anyone wants to know about "time in" ask me!!!

    This was a "good" expression, rather than the frown she had plastered to her face.  She was instantly able to erase the ugly face when my camera appeared.  (telling me much of this behavioral stuff is within her control)

    Rissy was found in bed with JanaLyn.  Rissy was explaing what the "Table of Contents" was in a book and how to look up the page of the story you want to read.  Then, she began to read to JanaLyn!
      
    Rissy wants to be a pediatrician, but I think she would make an excellent teacher.

    She made our dinner last night, Chili-Etti.  It's a recipe my mother copied from a newspaper when I was about Rissy's age.  I've spoken of it before and maybe even given the recipe on my blog.  Anyway, she literally did everything without my help - excpet *I* wrote out a new recipe card for her box!  She was even able to double the ingredients without my help to make a larger amount.

    Annamarie was in a quiet mood and trying to wake up in front of the TV.  A dumb cartoon that I made her turn off.



    MOVING ON:

    The girls are excited today because I will be decorating our garlands with birds, berries, flowers, etc.  They "think" they are going to "help" me, but it goes much faster when I do it alone.  They will have to be given the job of "judge and critique" regarding "how things look" rather than actively touching stuff!  Believe me, I've been through this before!  I speak from experience!
     
    It will be interesting to see how long the bottom decorations stay on the garlands!  So far, Chirper hasn't touched the garland, but I will have to put the cardinals and white doves out of his reach.  Even Stormy, a 3 year old cat, is tempted by the life-like birds!

    I bought (from the bakery section)  4 boxes of 2 dozen cookies each - oatmeal raisin, chocolate chip, sugar, and snicker doodles - and need to divide those up (6 of each flavor in a box) and freeze them.  I've found that to be the most efficient way to buy and finish off cookies.

    I also bought 5 (3lb each) containers of ground turkey.  Three on the top shelf and two on the bottom.

    It's taking up too much room in my refrigerator.  I divide it into approximately 1 1/2 pounds per freezer bag, so each of the original containers yields two bags of frozen meat.  We ate it again last night in the Chili-Etti and you couldn't tell the difference from it or ground beef.  This is about $1.75 a pound for 85% lean meat.  It's more economical than beef.

     
    Yesterday, Rissy bought a candle for her room, Mulled Cider.
       
    Normally she picks sweet pea, fresh rain, or something like that.  I was surprised at her desire for mulled cider!  She brought it to me with the matches and asked me to light it.  This is one of my favorite winter scents to burn.

    As I've typed, I've also fixed orange and cinnamon rolls for the girls' and my breakfast.  Yum!  I'm really on a sweets binge, lately!!  I also fed the cats and have put out little tattle telling fires.  This is shaping itself into a busy day!!!

    Tomorrow, we are meeting Jesse's brother, Frank, and Sharon for lunch at Red Lobster.  Her birthday is tomorrow.  We meet in a city about an hour away.  I hope we aren't made to wait a long time because of the Sunday church crowds.  Frank said he would make reservations, but I don't know if Red Lobster accepts reservations.  Well . . . what do you know!  His brother just called and said he thought it would be best to get there earlier!  So, that's what we'll do.

    Jesse has started a new medication for his migraines (which are frequent).  It is an anti-seizure medicine and some of you may be familar with it.  "Topamax."  He found a clinic that is free (based on your income and dependents) and was pleased to find his blood work was all within normal range except for a "slightly" elevated cholesterol level that no one was particularly concerned about.  The Topamax is $400 -something a month (I know!  Can you believe it?), but he qualified for a year of free prescriptions for that and Imitrex which IS used to stop a migraine.  Topamax comes with another price - lots of side effects.  This morning he said he had been up most of the night.  I feel bad for him.  Tangi takes the same prescription and said it's horrible for about 2 weeks, and then your minor headaches begin to fade away, not to mention the migraines.  She said it's worth all of the initial side effects.  One of his is an upset stomach, so I don't know how seafood will sit on his stomach, tomorrow.

    More of Rissy's reading books came from Pathway Publishers last night.  She was so excited!    They are at her reading level and slight above.  A nice challenge.

    Guess it's time to get off of here and start a project or two.  I lit the fireplace last night and intend to do it again today.  Nice toasty warm atmosphere!

    Be blessed  ~ 


  • Big Plans - It's Friday

    Before I get into talking about my "big plans" for the day, I'd like to thank all of you who wrote such kind words of encouragement to me the other day, regarding Luci's fit.  I have copied my blog from that day (and everyone's comments) and will take it to Luci's therapy appointment today.  I think it shows exactly what goes on around here and how we react when Luci is in one of her "B-A-D" moods.  It also shows the loving support I have from friends.  So, once again, THANK YOU!!!

    Also, thank you for all of the "Happy Birthday Wishes" you sent to my husband.  He was touched by my blog and I saw him wiping tears that he thought he had hidden from me.  Your comments were so sweet!

    Today is a new day and I was pleased to see that my new calendar for next year arrived while I was gone last night (my "Growing Kids God's Way" class).  Even though it was Jesse's birthday, he encouraged me to go the the group; AND, *I* got a gift!

    I chose this calendar for next year:
          It's a little hard to see all 12 months on the back, because of the glare from my desk's lamp.  But, you get the idea!

    Jesse picked Chinese food for lunch yesterday and we met him at the restaurant.  He took a half a day off of work.  It was a beautiful building, the food wasn't bad, but we can get the same quality of food at another restaurant, that isn't as ascetically pleasing, and costs a little less money per meal.  They were nice and made up a birthday dessert for him.  They came to sing "the restaurant's birthday song" and we had to laugh.  No one knew the words since the restaurant opened December 1st!  It's the same melody for our family's birthday song we sing to everyone on their birthday; but, ours has different words.

    Rissy  is already cooking breakfast while I'm trying to wake up with my 3rd cup of coffee!
     

    I managed to feed the cats.

    Although Chirper decided to forage for his own breakfast!
     
    Yum!  Tastes like chicken!

    It's a sad commentary of my domestic and mothering instincts when I manage to feed the cats; but, my own children have to fend for themselves over the stove, while I type and drink coffee!!!!!

    We're doing something a little different today.  THINKING we would have foster children by now, I set all of the girls' therapy appointments this month an hour earlier, giving me plenty of time to run errands afterwards AND be home in time for the foster children to be getting off of the school bus.  Well, OF COURSE (!!!!), there are no children yet - but, this should be a month of dry runs, allowing us to perfect our timing before any children DO arrive!!!

    I don't need much from the grocery store (a miracle!!), so that won't take a big chunk from my day.  I will also teach school this morning before we leave.  School is down to an hour (or slightly less) a day.  On Wednesday (after Monday's less than happily received change in agenda), the girls were more excited about December's school.  We will meet Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for about an hour - using my "new" book.  And, they will each have one page (front and back) of math to maintain their skills.  We'll still do "Saturday School" but it will also be slightly different until January.  THEY need a change and I definitely need a change!

    I made a strawberry cake with strawberry frosting for Jesse's birthday cake.  I HATE strawberry flavored things - only like the real strawberry fruit - but it's one of his favorites.  His mother told me, while she was in the hospital, she was going to surprise him with a pecan pie for his birthday.  She called yesterday and never said Happy Birthday to him.  The last couple of years, she's had in her head that his birthday is December 5th!  Anyway, I didn't want to duplicate her pecan pie, but I have the ingredients to make one.  I'm going to try it before Chirstmas to see how much I succeed.  It will be a first, but I've heard they aren't hard to make at all.

    Here's the Birthday Cake and what's left of it this morning.
      
    Can you believe we ate half of a cake???!!!!  After the Chinese food buffet lunch, we weren't very hungry for dinner.  Before I left for my meeting, Jesse opened his gifts (clothes) and we ate the cake.  He and I had TWO pieces.  This time I refrigerated it and it wasn't so "fake strawberry" tasting cold as it is when it's room temperature.  I can't believe I ate cake for dinner.  To top it off, I had 8 chocolate chip cookies for breakfast yesterday morning.  It's a good thing I only ate one meal at lunch yesterday!!!!  I don't remember EVER eating 8 cookies at one sitting OR eating 8 cookies for *breakfast*!!!!! LOL

    Don't know if I'll have time today, but will definitely get the garland decorated with birds and berries tomorrow.  We are doing well, as far as gift purchases, especially since we are keeping purchases down to a minimum this year.  We quit sending cards a long time ago, but I purchased some stationery to write news letters - 24 sheets.  I need to start thinking about what has been newsworthy this year!  I feel my life is a mundane repeat from one day to the next, but others say they find my life interesting . . . so, I continue to write!

    I let Sampson out this morning and looked at the sky.  I grabbed my camera to capture a picture and took a "quick one" of the sky and our barren trees.  It was 26° at the time.  The sky had an ominous, frozen gray look to it.  They are talking "snow" next Tuesday - but, I doubt anyone is counting on it.  It snows less and less every year.

    I suppose I should get moving since we need to leave earlier than usual.  The girls are in the bathtubs (thank you Lord for more than one bathroom!) and I have lists of things to do and a short grocery list to write. 

    Be blessed  ~   

  •  

    Thirteen Things About
     MY HUSBAND
     

    Today is Jesse's birthday.  Happy Birthday,Honey!

    1.  He is incredibly even tempered.  Rarely expresses anger.  Oh how I envy that quality in him!  He finds a way to enjoy some of the same things I enjoy.  Even things he formerly disliked . . .  intensely.  Like cats, for example!
     

    2.  Instead of using cuss words, when frustrated or after hurting himself, he says, "San Antonio!"  (no slight to those from San Antonio!!)  Even the little girls say that now when frustrated with something they can't do easily.
     

    3.  He pulls our children into bed with him and cuddles them and coos to them about how much he loves them and asks, "What would I ever do without my Goose?" (Luci)/  If he loves you, he lets you know it.  He has the best bear hug, ever!

    4.  He can quickly assess when I'm overwhelmed or not feeling well and jumps in to give help or has me sit and he and the girls finish.  All five of our girls adore him!
      

    5.  I love the way one of  his rough and calloused hands feels when it holds mine.

    6.  He remembers people, their names, and a piece of story about each person.  EVERYONE likes him and no matter where we go, we almost always run into someone who says, "Jesse!  How are you doing?!"

    7.  He likes his coffee with sugar and cream.  "Sweet and light, like you babe!" . . . although I'm not . . . *sweet*, that is!  I AM light compared to his beautiful black hair and dark olive skin.

    8.  He WANTS to take his family out to eat because he says he knows we stay home and eat at the house all the time.  Well, I *think* it's because he wants to treat us . . . maybe he's *really* tired of my cooking ???  Oh well, I won't go there!

    9.  He is a PRAYER WARRIOR par excellence.  He is an intercessor for anyone God brings to his mind.  NOT a gift I have - intercessory pray, I mean.
    (No picture here.  I'm not as brave as my friend, Amber!  tee! hee! - private joke!)

    10.  He is hysterically funny.  Reminds me of Robin Williams - but with a clean sense of humor.  He says things others would like to say, but would never dream of saying.  And, somehow, he gets away with it and leaves people holding their sides from laughing so hard.  The room lights up when he walks into it.

    11.  He genuinely cares about others.  He is there in a heartbeat for anyone in need and always trying to do "the right" thing.  He is there for us (his family) in the same way.

    12.  He is a hard worker.  One of the hardest ones I've ever met.  It's hard for him to slow down or take a day off because he feels he should always stay busy.  I worry about him not slowing down, but I also have nothing to worry about as far as him providing for his family.  He's a "worker" even if that means picking up our yard after it was T.P.'d!!!!

     

    13.  He tells others what a great wife he has!  I'm sure he exaggerates, but people tell me all the time how crazy he is about me and his children.  It was his idea to "get married again" on our tenth anniversary in a casual ceremony!
       

        

    Gosh!  I've run out of numbers to list.  Only 13?  There's tons more things I can think of, but I find myself at the end of the Thursday Thirteen list.

    Happy Birthday, sweetheart.  May God continue to richly bless you with everything your heart could ever imagine, and more!!

    I LOVE YOU!

    Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

    The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday.  Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged!  If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments.  It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

  • Bleah & Venting

    I need to preface this post today with what happened yesterday afternoon. 

    Luci had a big one.  By that, I mean a fit.  Not the usual angry fit but a screaming meany fit.  I think (but I can't exactly remember) it started when Annamarie and Rissy were watching a DVD movie and Luci turned off the TV twice.  I told her if she did it again, she wouldn't be able to watch the movie or play with the girls because she was being mean.  Despite my warning, she turned it off a third time.  I told her to play somewhere else.  The beautiful Luci child erupted and was out of control.  I know, as a parent, I am supposed to be in control, but I was slowly losing my calm as her tirade continued.

    I closed the bedroom door to the sound of angry words she screamed at us.  She came out several times (after NOT making a sound for 30 seconds) and said she was fine and wanted to go back in with the girls and the movie.  I told her "no" - a word that is like lighting dynamite, if spoken to Luci.  She stormed off again and I quietly closed her door to the threats and shrieks.   I spanked her (about 3 swats on the rear end) when she started screaming.  I had to hold her still and turn her over in order to get to her rear end.  *I* ended up pulling several ribs on my right side.  As I had figured, the spanking did no good.  Eventually, I told her to stay in her room and play until I called her for lunch and AFTER LUNCH, she would need to take a nap.  She screamed the whole time. 

    She was called to lunch, ended up leaving the table once or twice because something didn't suit her, and went back to her bedroom stamping her feet and yelling threats all the way to her room.  My resolve was wearing away.  After lunch, I sent her to her room for a nap and she screamed again - by now it was ear piercing shrieks - like from one of those "Jason movies" - you know? "over the top" screaming.

    It went on for 45 minutes (the high pitched screams and growling) and I wasn't sure how to address the whole episode.  I had already prayed.  And prayed.  And prayed.  When I'd had my fill (NOT the time you are supposed to discipline your children - not when you are tired or angry), I went back to her room, hovered over her and held her head still with my hands and proceeded to scream back (at the top of MY lungs) that I didn't like her fits and *I* was the one who was going to "call Daddy and tell him" (her words) and then I let loose with growling through gritted teeth and high pitched screams.  I admit, the screams were primal and a great release of my emotions, but totally inappropriate, nonetheless.  After my third ear piercing scream within inches of her face, she gasped and stopped her hollering.  I could tell we were finally "connecting" and I had gotten her attention.  I think, at that moment, she understood I had been pushed too far.  She told me she "promised" she'd stop - a promise she makes all the time but nothing changes.  I told her I didn't believe her because she said that ALL the time and nothing ever was any different with her.  If she didn't get to do what she wanted, she always screamed and threw a fit.  "I'm sorry" and "I promise" were lies because she never followed through.  At that point, we were making eye contact and I could tell she was listening.  I stopped my shrieks and said, through gritted teeth, she would stay in her room the rest of the day and play with whatever she wanted IN HER ROOM.  I would call her when dinner was ready.

    I promptly left and put myself in "time out" as I felt I had done more than enough wrong things in the parenting arena and, also, because I didn't want to cause her physical harm.  I placed a call to her therapist - for ME.  Rissy and Annamarie came to me and asked if I was okay and I assured them I *would* be and also told them I hated yelling at my children.  The two tried to comfort me with pats and hugs, and they assured me, that's exactly how they feel sometimes with Luci when she bullies them.  I felt sorry for them.  I felt bad for all the times I made them share and be nice to Luci when I KNOW she has been the cause of their discontentment.  I wondered, "How can I make them play with her, when I wanted nothing else to do with her?"  Bad Mom!  Bad Mom!

    As I kept to myself in my room, I realized I had pulled my ribs worse than I thought and my side ached horribly.  I didn't dare reach or twist and turn to the side, remembering the 3 times in my life I've had back spasms and not wanting a repeat of the same.  I took a shower and, OF COURSE, that's when the therapist called me back. 

    I called her back when I got out of the shower.  I asked if I had done anything irreparable to Luci while screaming and yelling in her face, then by ignoring her.  The therapist was great.  She said, IF she were in public school, she would have found out from the other children (or peers) that rejection comes from inappropriate social behavior.  It's something EVERYONE has to learn somewhere and at sometime.  She said, Luci is either not picking up the cues that I'm angry OR she is totally aware of it and continues to manipulate situations because she is self-centered (which she IS) and doesn't care about another person's feelings.  She said, if I didn't feel like talking to her today because I was upset with how she treated me yesterday, I should let her know.  I should tell her, "Your telling me I'm sorry doesn't take the sting out of what you did to me, yesterday."

    And, there's the conflict.  "don't let the sun go down on your anger" . . .  

    How do you teach a child life isn't all about them - and if they think it IS, they suffer consequences for being selfish???  How can I rebuke my child if it means I DO let the sun go down on my anger????  Where's that fine line????

    Here I sit, a new day, a new morning, and feeling love for a child I can't stand the sight of.  I'm being honest here.  Totally exposing my feelings and emotions.  She's been as sweet and gentle as she can be towards me this morning and I can barely answer her.  Apparently, Jesse had a talk with her about "no more fits" and being kind to others. 

    We've been through this before.  Shallow repentance that is short lived.  Then the mini-fits again.  Maybe it IS appropriate for me to reject her for a "short period" to teach her "I'm sorry" doesn't instantly fix *some* things.

    I wasn't particularly tired yesterday.  I did (at least) 8 loads (maybe 10) of laundry, cleaned the kitchen up a bit and took those large bins out to the garage.  I balanced the check book.  I wrapped Jesse's b-day presents.  I fixed dinner.  Things weren't overwhelming, despite the major meltdown of Luci.  I took a muscle relaxer for my back, laid in my bed to relax, and was surprised that I fell asleep shortly after 9:00 o'clock. 

    With all that laundry washed yesterday, I should be finished, right?  Nope.  Still piles are left AND that doesn't include the bath towels.

    Laundry leftovers to go with turkey leftovers (I'm making turkey noodle soup tonight)

    I just finished breakfast.  Junk food, but I feel like poor me deserves whatever *I* want today.  See how sickness feeds off of sickness???  See how selfishness begets selfishness? 
     

    I'm usually very good at holding my emotions at bay while Luci lets loose with her tirades.  That wasn't the case yesterday.  I don't know if it was the longer than usual ear piercing screams or if the day in day out fits (they've recently surfaced again every morning, until I swat her bottom, then they stop immediately) have worn me out.

    The other girls found some curly straws that I've had in the drawer for I don't know HOW LONG and are using them.  Luci asked if she could have one, too.  My first impulse was to say "no" to make her as miserable as I feel today, but I think I muttered, "I don't care what you do."  That wasn't exactly a true statement, but emotionally that's where I'm at with her today.  "I just don't care as long as you don't come near me."  Lovely attitude, huh???!!!

    How can you love a child so much and yet dislike them enough to not want to even look at them or hear their voice?  I sit in amazement as I watch Rissy and Annamarie playing "joyfully" with Luci today.  Why can't my memory be short and forgiving, like my childrens'?

    I suppose the main thing that happened yesterday was all about button pushing.  When someone pokes your arm over and over again in the same exact spot, it begins to hurt.  Then when it continues some more and the poke, poke, poking of that spot is unrelenting, some primal self-protection mode goes into operation.  I can't explain my feelings to myself, so I don't expect anyone else reading this to understand.  I feel like yesterday's "poke" was the straw that broke the camel's back.

    Our home study lady called early this morning.  She said she ended up with a pneumonia diagnosis and has been very ill.  This morning, she said she had been vomiting for the past 5 hours.  I told her not to worry, we weren't expecting children until next year.  She felt horrible and apologies continued from her.  I was very sympathetic of her illnesses.  Of course, there HAS TO BE a part of me that is happy I don't have to receive anyone in my home today.  A part of me that doesn't WANT TO try to put on my happy face.

    I didn't teach school yesterday, but WILL today.  I have to finish the laundry and make that turkey noodle soup.

    No way am I taking the sheets off of our big bed without help.  Don't want to stretch my ribs too far.

    Bleah!  What a downer post.  Everyone gets to see a side of me that doesn't emerge very often.

    Be blessed ~

    and please pray for my bad attitude and for me to find wisdom.  We see Luci's counselor again on Friday. 

  • Tuesday's Tease

    *I'm* not teasing anyone, but our weather in Oklahoma is teasing us!  SOOOO windy yesterday with temps in the low 40's and feeling more like the 20's. 

    Today's forecast?  Low 60's with a warm, south wind! 

    Tomorrow?  Back to the 40's with a north wind!!!! 

    No wonder there is so much illness in our state.  The weather mocks us and catches us unawares!

    Yesterday, after Luci's doctor appointment, we did some shopping for Jesse's birthday - just small stuff.  He's buying the big gift himself - a remote start for his truck.  I also picked up some wrapping paper and boxes.  There will be more boxes, than gift bags, this year because of the type of things I've bought - which means more work, right?!

    I was in the den, waking up with my cup of coffee, when Rissy came out and told me Stormy had thrown up in the hallway outside of her bedroom door.

    I sat down at my desk with my cup of coffee to relax.

    Next, I was shown the bedspread from Rissy's bed.  Stormy apparently had gotten sick there, too.
     

    Mind you, I haven't eaten yet and this was displayed right by my desk where I'm sitting!  Even Chirper gagged!

    Guess I'll be washing a bedspread today . . .

    Last night, to be *helpful* (while I was watching TV in my bedroom), the 3 girls all pulled their laundry baskets to the kitchen and combined their clothes into one huge pile.  Helpful, you say?  No!  Not at all!  I NEVER wash their clothes together.  Since they all wear hand me downs, I can never remember who is wearing what this year and neither do they.  So, I've started washing one child's clothing on one day, another child's on another day, and so on.  They also said they had divided it into piles of lights, darks and whites.

    Here is a picture of what awaits me after they "divided" things into "piles" . . .
     
    Do you see divided piles??  Because, I sure don't!!!  I see a huge pink mountain and my own whites next to the washer!

    Yesterday, the girls found (on top of the dryer) a toy I had bought Jesse-boy and Stormy.  Jesse-boy was never interested in "toys" because he knew they weren't real.  He was smart, that way.  Stormy was afraid of the toy, so it has been in the utility room for over a year.  The girls asked me to turn it on so they could show it to Chirper. 

    It's a ball that makes itself spin and has a long furry tail attached, that flops around as the ball turns.  I bought it at Cracker Barrel Restaurant.

    They turned it on near Chirper and it eventually worked its way to Chirper's tummy and he DID play with it.  At least my purchase wasn't a complete waste!

    Admittedly, he wasn't sure of what to think as it inched its way towards him!
        

    He had to pay attention when it worked it's way under him!
     

    The toy left him, headed for the foyer, and he went after it.  I think he lost interest when it continued on a path away from him.  He pawed at it for a while, but it appeared to have lost interest in *him* - so off he went.

    The girls were somewhat disappointed in school yesterday.  I had told them we would be doing something a little different through the month of December.  They nagged and I replied it was a *surprise* and they'd find out this week.  I pulled out the "What a First Grader Should Know" book and read:  rhymes, asked them riddles, read a story (using different voices for each character - I'm such a ham!), talked about the Nile and pyramids and pharaohs, talked about primary colors and what colors you mix to get a new color and gave them a color code sheet, and then we sang pages of traditional Christmas carols.  They each did one page in their math books. 

    After it was all over with, they asked, "When do we get the surprise?" 

    I explained that *was* the surprise.  They looked at each other (confused) and told me they didn't think it was a *good* surprise.  So, I asked, would they rather do pages of math, spelling, language, history, health, science, and Bible?????  They decided the new way of school for the month of December was a "good" plan, after all!!!!!

    I'm not sure what they equated a "surprise" to be in their minds, but our reduced school hours and my new book fell short of their expectations!!!

     
    I HAVE to clean up our house today.  Things have been left out, here and there and everywhere, because of my not being home long on Sunday and again yesterday.

    My "To Do" List:
    *  Put china and silver away (it's still on the dining room table!)
    *  Move garland and decoration bins back to garage
    *  Wash dining room tablecloth
    *  Wash the pink mountain of clothes & bedspread (!!!)
    *  Dust & vacuum
    *  Teach school.  
    *  Make turkey noodle soup for tonight's dinner OR, I may make the soup and heat it tomorrow night and fix something different tonight.

    Heated up soup might be a perfect idea for Wednesday.  Wednesday, around 4pm, the home study gal will be back out to show us what she has typed and have us sign it.  She still has to collect my signed medical releases giving her permission to ask the girls' therapist about the girls (to make sure they aren't killers, I guess!!!)  AND, Jesse had to have his boss (the man he's working for these few winter months) sign a sheet saying how long he'd know Jesse, etc., etc.  That's a good reference, because the friend has been a friend of Jesse's since before Jesse and I met, AND he is also the one doing our roof replacement.  Not only does he know Jesse as an employee, but also has been in our house and has seen us interact with our girls.

    Our caseworker (the one who's been out having surgery) called last night.  He wondered where we were at with the home study.  I told him she was coming Wednesday night for us to sign our approval.  He said he had 8 couples that were still not ready to be stamped with approval and we were one of those couples.  The others were kinship placements (for children who were already living with their relatives) and they came first in the court's eyes.  I'm not worried, and I told him we would simply look forward to receiving children in January.

    I suppose that's my exciting life (today) in a nutshell - not very news worthy - but *my* life, nonetheless.

    Be blessed  ~

  • Baby It's Cold Outside

    HOW COLD IS IT??? . . .

    It's so cold that our dog has been reduced to wearing his humiliating clothes - dog sweaters!  Although us humans think he should feel humiliated, Sampson eagerly lifts his head to push through the turtleneck's top and each front paw is lifted willingly into the sleeves.  HE LOVES HIS CLOTHES!!!!  What can I say?  Our dog loves clothes!

    This was all new to Chirper who saw Sampson come around the corner and jumped at the newly decorated bright red dog.  Chirper is our curious cat, and we lovingly call Sampson, "Our red neck dog!"
     
     

    It was cute and funny at the same time.  Sampson tolerated being checked-out by Chirper and we humans still got such a laugh out of the fact this dog (who doesn't do *anything* willingly - he's very set in his old doggy ways) jumps into sweaters and seems immensely happy and proud after doing so!

    However, when Chirper got to checking out Sampson's feet (he's very "sensitive" about his feet), Sampson wasn't so thrilled with the cat's curious examination and soon walked back to his bed, which he has currently pulled into Jesse's closet.
     
    I think Chirper was thinking, "Oh!  Thank you, LORD!!! . . . They didn't put SHOES on him, too!"

    Jesse and I asked Stephanie to come over and watch the girls after we returned from church and ate Thanksgiving leftovers for lunch.  We wanted to take advantage of Wal-Marts 0% financing & interest for 18 months on any Wal-Mart credit card purchase of at least $250.  We won't take 18 months to pay off our purchases, but it did make it possible for us to not have to spend extra cash this month.  We can wait until February or March to pay the bill completely off.  Today is the last day (December 1st) if anyone has a Wal-Mart card and needs to purchase gifts.  If you have a Wal-Mart credit card, check out their site for the coupon to print and take with you.  I pay bills online, so mine was sent to my email account from Wal-Mart.

    It was cold enough, yesterday, that I wore my itchy, black, full length, wool, winter coat.  I was going to carry it, but I needed to wear it with the collar and scarf clutched and scrunched up around my throat.  The temperatures were 44 and the wind was 30mph with VERY srong wind gusts.

    We took care of a bunch of gifts (we don't do much for Christmas, we would rather celebrate birthdays that are stretched out over the year and more personal) and only have a few things left to purchase, which will most likely be gift cards.

    As I mentioned before, we've wanted to go to Chili's for a few weeks and that's what we did last night.  Just burgers, but GOOD burgers - better than McDonald's, anyway!  We got home and changed into our warm flannel or fleece nightgowns.  The house felt so cold and my sweat pants are still up in the attic.  Brrrrr!

    Even the cats decided tolerating each other was profitable because of the warmth two bodies create!

    Trust me, this picture will be a rare one!!!  Stormy stays as far away, as possible, from Chirper.  He constantly teases her or jumps out and scares her.  This week-end she had her fill.  She turned on him and chased him all through the house.  The mad chase happened after we went to bed and Chirper kept jumping onto the bed (on our feet) for the safety his parents provided!  She didn't leave him alone.  It was almost like she was saying, "Fine!  You wanna *play* kitty, kitty?"!!!!!  He didn't think it was nearly as much fun being chased, as it always is to be the *chaser*!!!"

    He ended up running to our bed and lying down with me.  Ahhh!  The safety of a mother's protection!

    So here is the last, rare picture of the two cozied up to each other!  I don't think we'll see this very often in the future!
     
    They sure look sweet together . . . when they're sleeping!

    Luci has an appointment with her medical doctor late this morning. Just a check up because of the medicine she takes.

    I think we'll stop to buy Jesse's birthday cards.  Also make a stop at our post office box.

    Wednesday the gal writing our home study comes back for us to read and sign the study.

    Thursday is Jesse's birthday.  He's buying himself a remote start for his new truck.  Whew!  I don't need to stretch my creativity!  He's VERY HARD to buy gifts for and usually takes everything back.

    Sunday, we are meeting his brother and wife (her birthday is the 7th) at Red Lobster in a town between theirs and ours.  We did it last year and it worked well.  Guess I need to put Sharon's b-day card on my list, too.

    I'll be teaching school this week.  As I said before, I'm not using regular textbooks, but the one book that expands history, poetry, art, and other things beyond what their textbooks hold.  I'll probably just do a bit in their math books so they don't forget what they know, and we'll hit the books again in January.  So, "kinda" a break for all of us.

    Better run so I can bathe and be dressed in an hour!

    Be blessed  ~