Of course, that's like changing curtains in the kitchen.  Once the curtains are changed, then the kitchen towels need to be replaced.  That leads to new wall colors, which leads to changing cabinet colors, and so on, and so forth!

The reason for the unplanned cleaning spree?  She mentioned wanting to take some herbs for female-type symptoms and I had a ton of stuff that hadn't worked for me.  A VERY expensive collection, I might add.   By the way, I will not be buying anymore expensive herbal remedies, as I have settled the fact in my head that they never work and only pharmaceuticals affect me positively.  AND, chocolate!

I went through my messy stash of vitamins, aspirin, etc. and, in doing so,  ended up cleaning my closet shelves.  Yes that was plural.  Not just the *one* messy shelf I had posted a picture of on April 8th!  I cleaned five of the six shelves that hold my "beauty" products, memory and jewelry boxes (I no longer wear jewelry), and other female finery contained in jars, bottles, and small boxes. 

That redistribution led to cleaning some of the plastic bins that hold adult medicine and first aid stuff in Jesse's closet. 

The cleaning of the boxes in *his* closet eventually led me to cleaning some of the hall closet shelves - the ones up high - that contain the children's medicine, boo-boo first aid stuff, sun block, etc.

It took me most of the day to work on the closet shelves.  I took a few breaks.  I sat down at the computer and tried (without much success) to, once more, figure out "Quicken" and Jesse's lawn accounts.  I recorded all of his new customers.  I finally bought some CD-R discs because my computer says "CD Writer" on the CD door.  I'm assuming that means I can copy things to a CD.  Wrong assumption!  Nothing went right and the computer acts like that capacity (recording info) is non-existent.  I'm not smart enough to figure out the problem, nor to figure out HOW or IF the discs need to be formatted.   I may have to go back to my paper ledger sheets, if I don't have a breakthrough soon!

Other breaks I took included reviewing our finances and making calls to make payment arrangements for some big things that are demanding payment within the next 10 days.   Life insurance is one huge bill and they said I didn't have to pay for one year up front; but, I could pay quarterly.  I had no idea and we have struggled every spring (when the lawn business is just becoming active) with that lovely bill!!!

Rissy came up with the brilliant idea of making chicken salad for dinner.  Jesse doesn't care for it and had said he wouldn't be home for dinner last night.  I made it early in the day and it was delightful to sit down after my shower at 7pm to watch "American Idol" while eating dinner that had already been prepared.  Yee haw!  Plus, the chicken salad tasted really good!

Here are before and after pictures of my closet shelves.  The before condition of all five shelves were in an equal state of disarray!  Trust me!  My bottom shelf (#6) is the only one that stays neat because it holds bags of the on sale Bath & Body Works products I buy semi-annually.

Having these six shelves (floor to ceiling) made before me moved in was one of the smartest things we did!  It really expanded our storage capacity and I don't have to bend over to dig things out from under my sink.  The older I get the harder bending becomes!

This morning is my doctor appointment.  I better scaddadle before I'm running late.  ESPECIALLY since I'm seeing him for anxiety and stress!

No one did a neat job when cleaning their room.  In fact, one person didn't really even finish making her bed!

How do I teach them "work comes first" and still take advantage of the glorious weather?  And then there is another kind of work that makes home schooling year round VERY difficult on days like this.

But what about the books???  I suppose the girls can always use the extreme hot summer days to make up school time.  AND, we *are* in school for many, many more days a year than required by the state . . .

So, *I* said, "Go ahead and go outside.  We'll have to do SOME school work after lunch."

P.S.  Notice the boo-boo Luci had on *her* right side of her forehead is now just a white blotch?  As large of a goose egg as she received and for as ugly of a scab that formed less than a week ago, she sure healed quickly!  Thank you, Lord!

As I stared at that ball off and on throughout the week-end, I realized the memories that small, round and ragged object holds for me. 

I think it was purchased during the first years of our marriage, when we were still in our first small house.  I think we got it for Petey, a dog we no longer own.  Sampson was still lively enough that he played with that ball.  So did Gomer and Lucky, two cats who are deceased.

Even my older cat Jesse-boy (recently deceased) was found tossing that silly ball around, and scampering up and down the hallway, so many times.

The ball made it to our second house and into the children's toy box.  It was becoming shredded and I think I even tried to throw it away several times, but it always found it's way back into Annamarie's and Rissy's toys.  They loved to carry it around (perfect for little hands) and even (granddaughter) JanaLyn played with this ball.  The ball was bounced, rolled, carried in toy purses, and loved by all who found it.

We moved again (into our 3rd house) and low and behold the girls discovered "the ballllll" again!  They were thrilled to find it and they still roll it back and forth (bigger house now!!!) for hours on end.  They are 8, 7 and 5.5 years old, but they LOVE that ball!

In this third house, Jesse-boy (as old as he had become) still occasionally was found batting at the ball.  We have tried to encourage our dog Sampson to play with it; but, he is so old, now, he likes to have it in his bedding to "keep an eye" on it and that's as much activity we get from him regarding "the ball"!!!

Little Stormy (our 3yo cat) loves the ball and, most likely, she's the one who batted into the den.  It's been sitting there, untouched, for several days waiting for someone to discover it, again.  Despite its sedentary state, it was being enjoyed by someone.  Me.  Think of all the memories that ratty, miniature ball holds for me . . .

A dog and 3 cats we no longer have, foster children who live "who knows where," our own children who have grown older, a dog who has grown older, and a playful cat who finds bugs, a piece of Kix cereal, or a ratty tennis ball to entertain herself. 

All of these memories bring me much joy.  Who would have thought a Wal-Mart pet toy could do so much????  It's the little things that bring me pleasure.  I'd stop and smell those roses in my yard, the ones I photographed on Friday, but they are without fragrance. 

This one little ball is more than sufficient to make me smile.  It holds my heart and many, many memories!

*  Get off of the computer, jump in the shower AND wash my hair.  Got it done in record time.

*  Make sure the girls all have had something to eat, are dressed, hair is brushed, and shoes are on the right feet.  I "thought" I'd done this, but noticed Luci's shoes were on the wrong feet about an hour after leaving the house.  (sigh)

*  Pick up Stephanie around 11:30 so she can be at work by noon.  I was running late but got there at 11:40 and got her to work 4 minutes early.  Whew!  (mopping sweat from my brow)

*  Take JanaLyn and my three SOMEWHERE to kill time before eating lunch at 1pm.  Since PetSmart was such a success yesterday, we went to a different one today and then to CiCi's pizza for lunch.   What I  *won't* do for children!  (rolling my eyes)

*  Luci has a therapy appointment at 2pm.  Being the therapy hog I am, lately, I took part of her session and Luci finished the remainder of time.

* 
Stephanie gets off of work at 3pm (maybe later if they ask her to stay
until 5pm).  Luci's therapist usually runs really late, so I'm not sure
HOW I'll pick up Stephanie at 3pm.  I certainly can't leave Luci there
at the appointment by herself.  Not after what happened with her melt
down LAST Friday.  Stephanie called while I was in the therapy session to say she was off work and suggested I come inside the store because of a tremendous sale they were having.  I got to her store at 3:30pm and I bought 2 candles and some kitchen hand soap.

*  Get in some schooling while we wait at Luci's appointment.  (JanaLyn should be thrilled!!!)  I did.  And, JanaLyn was.  I also did some math (addition) drills with Rissy while we drove everywhere in the car.

* 
Haven't even thought about dinner tonight.  Guess I'll take out a pound
of ground beef from the freezer and get creative when the dinner hour
rolls around.  The mystery meal for tonight is chili.  It's simmering on the stove now.

My bed is made and the house is in fairly decent
shape except for the dishwasher needing to be emptied.  The world won't
stop revolving if I don't empty the dishwasher until tonight while I'm
cooking!  I emptied the dishwasher while the ground beef for the chili was browning.  I also have some larger pans soaking in hot soapy water.

It's still gray outside and cloudy.  It won't be as
warm today (maybe 75 degrees) as yesterday (85 degrees).  Running
around with 4 little ones makes me work up a sweat no matter WHAT the
outside temperature!   It ended up being rather chilly when we left  and warmed into the low 70's, but it was EXTREMELY windy later.

Despite all of the stress of corralling 4 little ones and keeping them happy for 3 hours, I found two bright spots in my day, for which I'm grateful.

And, finally . . . My comfort.  My shelter.  Tower of refuge and strength.

The week is almost over and I'm smiling!  (big toothy grin!!)

*  Get off of the computer, jump in the shower AND wash my hair.

*  Make sure the girls all have had something to eat, are dressed, hair is brushed, and shoes are on the right feet.

*  Pick up Stephanie around 11:30 so she can be at work by noon.

*  Take JanaLyn and my three SOMEWHERE to kill time before eating lunch at 1pm. 

*  Luci has a therapy appointment at 2pm.

*  Stephanie gets off of work at 3pm (maybe later if they ask her to stay until 5pm).  Luci's therapist usually runs really late, so I'm not sure HOW I'll pick up Stephanie at 3pm.  I certainly can't leave Luci there at the appointment by herself.  Not after what happened with her melt down LAST Friday.

*  Get in some schooling while we wait at Luci's appointment.  (JanaLyn should be thrilled!!!)

*  Haven't even thought about dinner tonight.  Guess I'll take out a pound of ground beef from the freezer and get creative when the dinner hour rolls around.

My bed is made and the house is in fairly decent shape except for the dishwasher needing to be emptied.  The world won't stop revolving if I don't empty the dishwasher until tonight while I'm cooking!

It's still gray outside and cloudy.  It won't be as warm today (maybe 75 degrees) as yesterday (85 degrees).  Running around with 4 little ones makes me work up a sweat no matter WHAT the outside temperature! 

I picked up Stephanie at 10:30am (she had to be at work by 11am).  I
waited 10 minutes in the car for her (sigh) and then off we went.  I
took the turnpike to get her there quickly.  I took the wrong exit (too
soon) and had to crawl through traffic the rest of the way to her store.  She was 5
minutes early.  (Yay, Cherylyn!)

I went to the post office to check our box for mail, in particular checks for Jesse's lawn business.  It was so empty it echoed!  (Boo, Cherylyn!)

Next we went to Target.  I found some tops for JanaLyn, a nightgown for
Rissy, and a dress for Annamarie on sale.  AND (joy of all joys!!!) the
scent of fabric softener sheets I really like - the ones Wal-Mart quit carrying.  Most smell like sweet
perfume, but this is Chamomile and Lemon Verbena by Bounce.  A very
"clean" smell IMO.  (Yay, Cherylyn!)

Next we went to the other end of the shopping center to PetSmart.  I
guess it's now obvious to you that I was killing time with the girls!!!  I'm in love
(absolutely and truly in love) with a purple male parakeet they have in
their huge cage of parakeets.  Also, looked at their cats and fell in
love with an 11 week old kitten that looks similar to how Jesse-boy
looked.  Pulling myself away from PetSmart, without adopting an animal
of some sort each time I'm there, is VERY hard.  But, the little girls
had a good time.  (Yay, Cherylyn - no new pets in my house and the little girls thought I was wonderful!)

Next was McDonald's.  The rule:  You have to eat ALL of your lunch
before you get to play and NO HAPPY MEALS because they are too
expensive.  We got 3 double cheeseburgers, one 10 piece nugget box, and
2 super sized fries with 5 glasses of water.  Only $10 and some change
for all of us!  (Yay, Cherylyn!) 

The girls ate really well and quickly, but weren't exactly happy about having to wait to play.

On the way out of McDonald's, Luci commented she wasn't happy because she had wanted me to order the fruit salad for her.  Annamarie complained she wished she didn't have an appointment to go to.  JanaLyn wished she had on a longer dress like my girls.  Rissy was just plain thirsty and wished she still had a drink.  *I* wished they'd all stop complaining.  (Boo-Hoo, Cherylyn!)

Next we got to Annamarie's appointment 5 minutes early.  The ladies behind the reception desk know us like "family" and said I could leave Annamarie with them so I could go pick up Stephanie from her job.  "Thanks so much," I said as I headed back out to the car.  (Yay, Cherylyn!  Someone offered to help you.)

I had no more gotten on the turnpike to head up to Bath & Body Works when Rissy heard my cell phone.  It was the therapist's secretary who said "Annamarie is alright, but, the therapist wouldn't be able to see Annamarie today at all.  It was totally unavoidable."  I apologized that I wouldn't be able to pick Annamarie up right away because I was picking up Stephanie.  (Boo-Hoo, Cherylyn!)

Stephanie was 15 minutes late getting off of work and I was stressing about poor Annamarie being left at the doctor's office waiting for me.  She doesn't always comprehend things well and I didn't want her to be nervous.  So, I was nervous for both of us.  And, JanaLyn had begun to complain and whine that she was disappointed in the day because she hadn't gotten to home school with me (she'd brought books just in case).  (Boo-Hoo, Cherylyn!)

Stephanie got in the car and JanaLyn began to whine BIG TIME.  Stephanie asked what was wrong and I explained that we had gone to the post office, then Target where JanaLyn got 3 new blouses and a nightgown, then we went to PetSmart where we looked at fish, lizards, birds, and cats, then we moved onto McDonald's where she got the chicken nuggets she preferred (she inserted, "But, it wasn't a Happy Meal!") and to play on the big toy for almost an hour . . . BUT . . . she didn't get to homeschool, so she had had a rotten day!"  (Temper!  Temper, sarcastic Cherylyn!)

I picked up Annamarie (who was totally fine) and drove Stephanie to the drive-thru pharmacy so she could get her prescription and took her and JanaLyn home.  JanaLyn was VERY gripey because NOW she wanted to come home with me.  (Sigh, Cherylyn!)

Anyway, I made it through babysitting a brood of little chicks in my car and I'm back home feeling . . . well, okay.

Breakfast is for dinner tonight.  Eggs, turkey sausage links & patties, and pancakes.

Tomorrow should be interesting.  It's Luci's therapy appointment this time at 2pm and Stephanie works from noon to 3pm.  Maybe we'll find a library and attempt to homeschool there!  Then again, maybe I'm crazy!

Yesterday, I made an appointment with my physician to see about him placing me on anti-anxiety medication.  I think I might have too much on my plate these days.  I'm yelling a WHOLE lot.  I'll have to wait until next Wednesday to see him.

I'm picking up Stephanie to take her to work.  She has a new part time job at Bath and Body Works.  I'll watch JanaLyn for 3 hours while Stephanie works. 

Since I'll have my three with me, I guess I'll take the 4 girls to McDonald's and let the "big toy" allow them to run off steam.

Annamarie has a therapy appointment at 2pm and Stephanie gets off work at 2pm.  As soon as Annamarie goes into her appointment, I'll pick up Stephanie and take her and JanaLyn home, and then I'll go back to pick up Annamarie.

Everything is in VERY close proximity to our therapist's office.  That's a GOOD thing since my gas guzzling Suburban is the vehicle of choice.

Stephanie's van still isn't running.  They are now thinking it's a vacuum line.  But, we are at the mercy of an off-duty mechanic who has to find time to work on her van.  Nothing he's tried thus far has been successful and no one can afford to pay for a mechanic shop to look at it.

Welcome to my world of servitude! 

(I don't think I said that with a "willing-to-serve" attitude)

I've been struggling lately with my ability to parent.  Annamarie has been diagnosed with severe Pervasive Developmental Disorder (connected to autism) and Luci has been diagnosed with Oppositional Defiance Disorder.  They both see a therapist once a week and the therapist is available to me if I need her.  I've needed her last week and the week before.

Luci has been "over the top" lately.  She's throwing horrible fits, yelling hateful things, and screaming this high pitched scream at the top of her lungs that pierces every fiber of my being (not to mention my ear drums).  I had my fill of her last night when I served a stir-fry meal and gave her one small piece of zucchini and one small piece of yellow squash (vegetables she doesn't like).   I tried to fill her pasta with tomatoes (she loves), celery, and chicken to please her.  She went ballistic and threw a fit in her chair when she saw the two pieces of squash.  When asked to leave the table, she jumped up and down in her chair than ran with her high pitched scream.  I didn't handle it well at all.  Last Friday, she threw her first major fit at the therapist's office.  The therapist sent for me in the waiting room and they quickly ushered me through everyone's office to get me to the "playroom" as quickly as possible.  Luci was sitting in a bean bag chair shouting, screaming, kicking, and, well, you get the picture.  The therapist (who specializes in children with this disorder) was visibly shaken.  Her entire body was trembling and I said, "THIS is what I deal with several times a day - or even worse behavior."

Annamarie has, seemingly, forgotten most everything I've ever taught (repeatedly taught, over and over again) and has done things that are just "without thought" (or, "dumb" to put it in unkind terms).  She's edgy all the time (like pre-teen hormones, yet she is only eight) and fights with her sisters.  I know teaching a child with PDD is not the easiest task and very unrewarding, but I feel committed to homeschooling these 3 children and can't ship them off to a public school for the sake of "special ed teachers" - just to make my life easier (and that would be the ONLY reason I would do that).

I think the little bit of patience I had left (yesterday) flew out the window (last night).  Fortunately, we school year round with no official breaks.  I am taking a "break" today from teaching or using what few brain cells I have left.   Jesse wants Luci on heavy medication and her therapist says she HAS to be given the chance to learn how to "self-calm" before being drugged up.  It makes sense to me.  Luci's physician (IMO) over medicates all patients.  Luci was on five different (heavy duty) drugs at one time and her fits never subsided.  Now, Luci takes one medication for bi-polar disorder, which is also used for emotional outbursts.  I feel very uneasy giving her psych drugs without FIRST trying to teach her to control her emotions.  I've read so much about Oppositional Defiance Disorder and the general consensus is that it isn't treatable with a pill.

It's another gray day and we are under the threat of severe storms (typical Oklahoma spring weather) and so leaving the house to "get away" really isn't an option.

Happy,happy post . . . right?  So sorry.

Remember all of the laundry I have washed to get pretty short sleeve and sleeveless dresses into the girls' closets?

Remember all the lawn work Jesse has been doing, which includes our own yard?

Remember my "spring fling" bags April 15th?

"WHY?" you ask?
 
"WHY the abandoned yard toys?"

"WHY the children indoors in their bedrooms?"

"WHY the muddy (newly cleaned) rug?"

Oh, the irony!!!

It's supposed to be 80 degrees today.  Maybe this afternoon will be different.  But, I had to wonder WHY?????  WHY I worked like a pack dog to get all their clothes switched out this past week-end! 

After 15 minutes, they all came in from playing outside, and Rissy asked if they could all have a cup of hot chocolate!!!!

I'm thinking a BOX of See's chocolates might help me!

I found all the people I lost earlier.  They were under "general contacts" and it was easy to click a box and request they be added to "customers" and . . . Voila! there they were.

I remembered (from a couple of years ago) an invoice needed to be created before you showed a check had been received.  I created an invoice for each customer.  Then I entered a payment had been received for the same amount.

Now it's showing all of Jesse's customers owe us three times their bill which should reflect a zero balance.

I'm calling it quits for today. 

Enough math for me!  I'm going to watch Jeopardy!  At least I can answer some of those questions!

MY HEAD HURRRRTS!