September 1, 2009

• Feeling Slothful

  Another long night. 

  I had trouble with dizziness & nausea last night WHILE I LAID DOWN!!!!  Sometimes I think a good chiropractor is what I need.  With the damage in my thoracic spine from cancer, I doubt anyone would dare touch my neck or my back! 

                                       

  Late last night, I watched HGTV for hours, trying to make myself sleepy.  I WAS sleepy, yet couldn’t fall asleep.  My bed spun around like a ride at the fair and my dinner was looking for an escape. 

  *BUT*, I always find something to be glad about!!!  . . . after hours of watching TV last night, I’ve learned how to 1) refurbish an old house and bring wiring up to code,  2) how to buy a house for the first time (even though I’m living in my third house!), 3) what to look for if buying a loft-style condo (of which I have *NO* interest), and 4) I learned that butter cream frosting melts at room temperature and won’t hold the fondant icing that is applied on top of it (in case I’m ever in a cake decorating competition) . . .     How much of that information will I be able to apply to my REAL life?  Probably none of it!!!

  I tried sleeping on my back with no pillow (thinking it would relax my neck) and it really didn’t help.  Then, I sat on the edge of the bed (for what seemed forever) with my throw up basin . . . thankfully, I never needed it!  Then, I cried a bit because I felt lousy and wanted my mommy.  I guess, no matter how old we become, a person always wants their mommy at certain times in their life – that’s if you’ve had a mommy to comfort you as a child. 

  I can tolerate a great deal of things, but I draw the line at fevers and nausea & vomiting.  I crumble under the pressure, every single time.  I prayed last night.  I would have listened to my P&W music, but my headphones no longer work with the boom box, and I didn’t want to wake up my sleeping family.

  So, I slept until 9:45am today – until the voices of arguing children forced me from bed.  I don’t even know what they were arguing about, because it stopped, immediately, when they heard me pulling the sheet & blanket from my body!!!

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  Luci, Rissy, and I enjoyed some sweet cantaloupe for breakfast this morning.  It’s one of the few things I can taste.  Rissy made meatloaf, shells & cheese, and seasoned green beans for dinner last night.  I had made a peach pie for dessert.  She did most of it without my help.  I could taste the ketchup on the meatloaf, occasionally the green bean flavor, and the lard in the pie crust.  I served myself small portions and had to force the second half of my plate down:  due to lack of interest!  I don’t know how I’ll eat if the radiation side effects really cause a lumpy feeling in my throat and the top of my stomach.  I already feel apathetic toward food  -  not a good way to start out radiation therapy!

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  Jesse called this morning to remind me that we had to go to the radiation appointment early this first time.  I’m glad he called.  I don’t remember them saying that, at all.  I don’t remember much of what ANYONE says, these days.  I DO remember how Jesse used to never remember anything, and I used to think for both of us.  He claims he hasn’t improved since I became ill.  That’s a scary thought to contemplate, isn’t it???  !!!!!!!!

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  I finally finished my book – the one I’ve been posting here at the beginning of my blogs for the past 92 million days!!!!  It was the second book in a series.  Imagine my joy when I discovered the next book to read on my shelf was a third book in the same series!!!!  Yes, I file books in order of sequence (and by author) on my bookshelves.  One of my many quirks.  BUT . . . (!!!)  I don’t arrange my spices alphabetically!!! 

  I DO arrange them in order of their nationality.  Italian stuff sits together, Mexican stuff sits together, American (Thanksgiving???) spices are together, and DESSERT (a nationality all its own!!!!) spices and flavors sit together on my round, Rubbermaid turntables in the cabinet. 

  Groupings of nationalities make more sense to me than alphabetizing my spices.

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  Beside the appointment for myself this afternoon, I have a definite urgent assignment to accomplish:  Clean the top of my desk!

  It was tidy seven, or so, days ago.  But, somewhere in between then and now, it exploded!  I think part of the problem is my ChorePack book and its clutter of attachments.  I’m afraid if I put any of it away, the ChorePack idea will soon diminish, fade away, and disappear!!!  And we don’t want THAT to happen!!! 

  The fact is, *I* need a ChorePack for these types of chores (the desk) that need to be done, but are forgotten until they present themselves in front of my face, again.  I don’t see this desk mess until I sit down at my desk, and look for the mouse!!!  It is truly amazing that our visual minds are able to block such a horrifically, traumatic sight!
                                       
                                      That’s a bowl of cantaloupe in the center over my keyboard.  Yum!

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  So, with an appointment today in my not too distant future, a messy desk to clean, and nothing thawing for dinner tonight, why am I sitting here? 

  I know what I really want to do . . .

         
  follow Stormy’s example!!!!!

  I need to borrow Martha Stewart for a day!

  Be Blessed  ~

  • 12:57 pm
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